#carrion #vss365

on days like today I think I would very happily #defenestrate myself but you're not supposed to admit a fact like that in the modern world so I will smile politely finish the washing up and keep myself far from the window instead #vss365

#fiend #vss365

Every moment, Every breath, Every sunrise, Every sunset, Every bird in the sky, Every cat, Every picture on the wall, Every sigh, Every book, Every movie, Every embrace through love, Every heart, Every song, Every dog, Every cloud, Every dream, Every passing thought, A #gift. #vss365

it all comes apart your #gift turning to dust in my fingers I can feel myself unraveling you say you are the strong one, but my womanhood has forced me to withstand horrors that you could never understand. ironic, isn't it? the patriarchy comes for us all eventually. #vss365

I try to regard this second life I have been given as a #gift, but sometimes it feels like a death sentence. Wracked with fear, I agonise over every decision. I know this is not the life he wanted for me, yet it is the life I am stuck with: finding myself the biggest disappointment of all. #vss365

#forbidden #vss365

I still find myself very nervous to tell people I'm writing a book. But I've officially hit over 5.6k words, so maybe I can admit that it's happening now?

#horror #vss365

I don't mean to #tether myself to everything awful for me I simply cannot help it. I am called to the chaos, a fatal attraction to which I hold no power against although, honestly, if given the choice, I would choose you again and again and again #vss365

once you held me, soft and close, murmured promises of protection, your own oath you swore you say this wasn't your #intent but that doesn't stop me bleeding here, lying on the floor and though my body aches for you so longingly, I don't think we can call this love anymore. #vss365

#betrayal #vss365

#vss365 #feral

Survivalist Swallowed whole by concussive air I beg to breathe no more, But they say you must stay Enduring the whips & scorns of time Because suffering is beautiful— a necessary part of the life you abhor And escape is unfair to all others Who chain you to the sticking point. #poetry #Skywriting

Alongside being a poet I'm also a proudly born and raised woo-woo girlie ✨

I have these days where I feel like a #phantom when the sadness decides to take over and my body lies hollowed out invaded days where the light hides itself from my eyes and I lie in bed still. silent. using all of my energy just to keep myself breathing #vss365

He's home 😭🥰

If I tried to write a #letter detailing all the things you've given me the world would run out of stationary before I was even halfway done #vss365

We had to rush one of my cats to the emergency vets yesterday because he ate a daffodil leaf. I think he's going to be absolutely fine, but they had to keep him overnight and he's still there. The wait for any news and to see when we can pick him up is awful.

#water #vss365

Healing fatigue is real, and something everyone will experience during their journey. Let's talk about it: surl.li/iiuoos #substack #healing #trauma

the marks you left stain like #ink on my skin fuck, sometimes I wish I'd never let you in. #vss365

And we're back! After a long hiatus, I'm returning to #Substack with an essay about writing, the effects of cringe, and trying to be true to yourself. Read the latest post here: bit.ly/4d5fwa6

#vss365 #exalt

first she'd #exalt the daybreak then steady the pen before facing the page’s smooth bark & entering its bare plain drawn repelled desiring withdrawing at last inscribing herself on the blank surface hoping that through words erasures surges a meaning might answer back #vss365 #poetry

it took a lifetime to #conduct my defences against you it took longer still to keep them standing solid, strong it took you two days to bring them crashing down how long to build them again I do not know I would let you tear them down a thousand times more to keep me away from sorrow #vss365

a blazing throne towers in the sky atop it you sit looking down everything lies in your command not even the planets are free from your touch; their #revolve their whole path around you. Yet sadness takes hold as you sit there, alone dreaming someone comes close enough to hold you #vss365

surrender to the joy of wonder allow curiosity to #fascinate you and everyone around you curl into the dirt creeping under your fingernails and take a breath in tandem with the trees know you're enough just as you are 'cause how could you not be? you're dust from a star. #vss365

may the music greet u may the words say hello may u be counseled by truths u have known may the music #fascinate u may the words seep into ur bones may u be chaperoned when out on ur own may the music transport u may the words become ur own may u be consoled when achingly alone #vss365 #poetry

My thoughts flutter from place to place a swirling #tempest in my mind I am prepared for tumult such as this, still it leaves deep wounds behind Courage is my flaming sword; growth my close companion Together we can weather any storm and forge on without abandon #vss365

Frustration is the sky refusing to accept that stillness is its truest name, yet here, the water holds what heaven will not: the world, inverted, just the same. #vss365

I awaken each morning, arise out of my bed, and choose to treat myself with kindness. It's true that quite often I #frustrate myself instead, catch myself in the midst of cruel thoughts. But when this happens I pause, take a deep breath, and show myself compassion like no one else could. #vss365

#vss365 #endorse

This is just to say I will not #partake in your so-called adult life, especially not if it involves guns & violence. It's true, I also held a gun, but only ever aimed at the bull's eye to win my love a peacock feather or a plastic rose. #vss365

A meeting gaze across the dancefloor your incoming presence looms lips to my ear, you ask if I #partake an exchange of sly grins, a slight nod, the delicate placement onto my extended tongue; a love letter from you to me. Hand in hand to meet the night eagerly filled with curiosity. #vss365

#harmony lurks, hiding inside each day frolicking within the twisting tree branches as they compete for the sun resting inside the moment when the lapping ocean waves meet the steadfast shore or curling itself up in the sheets beside us as you hit snooze once more #vss365

The woman who visits me loves to brush my #bonny hair in the moonlight. Sometimes she brings me gifts in exchange for my make-believe stories. I must remember to cover all the mirrors, though, lest the face of my mother, petrified and screaming, stares back at me. #vss365

Our fingertips curl together as the storm rages outside. The rain pattering against our window is fitting, pathetic fallacy for the longing radiating from within. You draw me in close as #lightning flashes outside; our lips conjunct, heavy as the rolling thunder. #vss365

I stare into the pool at my feet, nostalgia threatens to take hold. Endeavouring to escape the past, my reflection breaks as I toss my stone. My beginning may not have been magical, but my ending will surely be #enchanted. Because I will mould it as I wish, to make it everything it should. #vss365

Today, I cannot write a poem about love, hope, or joy. Today, all I can think about are the women and girls who are hurt and murdered by those who are supposed to love them most. Today, there is a #lacuna deep in my heart, and I cannot imagine it will ever fill again. #vss365

Oh, don't mind me, I'm just sobbing while writing a poem about femicide and the treatment of women in the modern age :)

#vss365 #dark

A quick beginning messy, too but worth it all to be with you Held every flaw you saw it all gone are the days I swore I'd fall Hand in hand #touch to touch eternity with you will never be enough #vss365

Do not call me a #ghost. Speak, if you must, of my spectral complexion. Comment on the spirits dancing lethargically inside my pupils. Whisper about how the fire was extinguished inside me. But do not call me a ghost. For I am much more akin to a poltergeist and I must warn you: I do bite. #vss365

#pain deep in my chest breath caught a feeling I can't escape agony flaming over my skin words taste thick ash on my tongue tormenting memories, fleeting I have laboured myself for you, although you will claim you did not ask me to and so it grows, continually #pain #vss365

You speak with such loving conviction that your words get rubbed into my skin an ointment designed to #soothe the hypervigilance of my soul bringing with it intense longing to see in myself all of the beauty that you claim emanates from me. #vss365

I look at you through the windowpane open my mouth to speak, but in vain. Ears pricking at the #thrum of the rain heart thudding, fear takes over again. If you never meant to cause me pain, why did you make me feel so insane? In the end, I have nothing to gain there's only myself to blame. #vss365

#vss365 #obfuscate

The agony of self-control blooms within our breasts evading feelings like it's sport yet helplessly we stand together, every caress lingers incessantly until no more can we deny our breathing intertwines watching your lips #quiver our eyes meet and finally I can feel you forget her #vss365

dreamy beginnings of hyperfixation overcumbered swirling passions optimistic foundation the passage of time with no explanation a #wane of enthusiasm thrills left behind, hidden in impossible restoration desolation grows with procrastination kneeling defeat warm intimacy a lost sensation #vss365