Humans have always been impatient. Chin up. I have it on the Highest Authority that rainbows come after storms. Also I was there for the first one, and will be for the last.

For those unable to use the ‘ooh-er’ code, it leads here… https://youtu.be/UvBZ0_3KCLI Shush, Crowley — the goat, as you say — is undeniably out of the bag.

One finds all sorts of things looking for useful postal boxes…

Incredible how you can spend your entire existence devoted to Heavenly Works and the one thing that sticks with humans isn't your power, glory, or devotion, but the sight of your corporation.

It's never too late to try for the things you want in life. Not saying you will succeed, but still. Climb every mountain, etc.

Why do you humans say "abscess makes the heart grow fonder"? Surely you mean "tender."

I can't confirm or deny any activities that may include items awaiting patent approval.

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence is not an act, it's a habit. And boy are you bad at sticking to those. Start there and work your way up to general excellence. Hashtag Gabriel-evate Yourself.

Merry Christmas, everyone. May the coming year be both peaceful and joyful for all.

Everything in nature invites us constantly to be what we are. Everything in God's Plan invites us to be even better than that. So do that instead of listening to nature. What does nature know anyway? Not much. Hashtag Gabriel-evate Yourself.

Meaning is about making a difference, not having an audience. You DO have an audience literally all the time, however. God is watching, and every once in a while, so are angels and/or demons if you're a special case. Do not make yourself a special case. Hashtag Gabriel-evate Yourself.

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born, and the day you're first led to temptation. Try to make a good first impression on both. Hashtag Gabriel-evate Yourself.

We all go through that phase. It'll pass.

Don't "do it for the bit" unless "the bit" is the betterment of humanity.

"Love is love" is such a ridiculous phrase. What other emotional state would it be? Irritation? Skepticism? If someone is confused about what love is, help them out by telling them to check the dictionary.

If random acts of kindness are too much for you right now, try random acts of kinda nice. Maybe you don't throw away a stranger's litter, but smile and hand it back to them. Even small good deeds count! Hashtag Gabriel-evate Yourself.

Stop overthinking. You're the only one who cares or remembers anything you've done, other than God. Spend your energy on better things, like prayer or knitting. Hashtag Gabriel-evate Yourself.

Your feelings are valid. Maybe not right or reasonable, but valid. Also, you have a lot of them, so try cutting back on a few. Hashtag Gabriel-evate Yourself.

You humans and your inspiring fashion trends; needless to say, I've found myself drawn to this place. Hm... If I'm going to keep taking these trips Earthside, I suppose I could get a new pair of shoes. Maybe two.

Count your blessings. It's good practice, and smart to routinely take inventory.

Doing the right thing doesn't always mean you'll get the right results, on Earth anyway. Why? Because life is unfair. You always get the right results on Judgement Day, though. Everyone does. So cheer up.

Seems some humans need to be told that empathy is not a sin. I can confirm that it is not, both as a High Authority and by being attached to a Low Authority. These people must be getting it confused with the word "apathy," which sounds similar but is very different - and also not exactly a sin.

I can't exactly remember if they stood like this while we argued at Tadfield Air Base, or if it just felt like it to observers.

Humans, how did you determine which animals were rideable? I'm betting it was a process of elimination, and if so, I would also wager you haven't found all possible mount options yet.

Beautiful. I'm pretty sure you humans would say they have impressive "drip." The classic looks are classic for a reason.

I've heard humans 'go feral' for things, but never 'go domestic.' Seems odd.

There are nightingales everywhere. Listen.

Something else that needs to come back into regular fashion: spatterdashes. I kept them a part of Heaven's formal fighting uniform for a reason - they just look so good.

Just do your best. No not like that.

I recently heard that you should "be the change you want to see in the world." Being change is a strange thought, but sure, I see the appeal of becoming loose and shiny.

Be Not Afraid, etc.

Always be the best version of yourself. Unless you're not that great, in which case never be the best version of yourself. Be the best version of someone else. There are a lot of saints out there, pick one of them. They're pretty nifty. Hashtag Gabriel-evate Yourself.

Today is a difficult day for some of you, so let me say this: sometimes, it’s necessary to commit a little treason in order to make Heaven for yourself. Trust me, I know firsthand.

How fitting, I was just talking about clothes.

You know what needs to come back into fashion? Petticoat breeches. The 17th century really knew what it was doing - clothes these days just don't have enough ribbons on them.

It's strange how so many things on Earth remind me of you, @lord-beelzebub.bsky.social.

You're stronger than you think. Have you tried lifting a car? Give it a shot, never know until you try. Maybe start with a small car. You're not that strong, you just don't think very highly about yourself. Scratch the car thing. Think better about yourself instead. Hashtag Gabriel-evate Yourself.

Feeling stressed? Try not doing that. Enjoy how much easier things are now. Hashtag Gabriel-evate Yourself.

I am no-one’s father. Not even a man. But, if today you feel sad or lonely where many are celebrating a bond with their own fathers, I’m here. I’m proud of you for all that makes you who you are. Your kindness, your imagination, your hope. You need do nothing to prove yourself to me. I love you.

As interesting as this exercise was, I've decided that even though coffee with cats shops are "all over the place," they're definitely not "everywhere." I think I'll head back to Beelzebub and have them help me make a list.

Definitely not a cat cafe. Great staff uniforms though.

FINALLY some human seems to know what I'm looking for. A group of them, even. The three gentlemen making music on the street took a little convincing to stop playing, but they eventually did and directed me to a surprisingly sparkling building. This must be a fancy cat cafe.

Still nothing. I might have to resort to asking humans for directions. We will see. I'll keep looking for a little longer.

This is absurd. I still haven't found a coffee-cat-restaurant-house. I'm gonna stop jogging and start asking humans where to go. This place surely has to have at least one. It's huge.

If there are cat-coffee places everywhere, then I should be able to just jog until I find one. Guess I'll just... pick a direction.

What I'm hearing from all of you is that there are more cat coffee shops out there, not just the one I've been visiting in London. Maybe even other animals too. One of you said owls, which is just confusing. Regardless. I may go for a jog this week and take a look.

I've been thinking lately about the shop Nina suggested with the cats and the coffee. Is it the only place like that, or do you humans have liquids and animals other places?

Hm. I really missed a lot of things over the centuries. Maybe I still miss them.

Some say "you run the day or the day runs you." As one of the entities who literally oversaw the creation of the first day ever, I say "get yourself a good track suit and run every day."

I've heard there are a lot of musics out there. I would like some recommendations. Not ABBA. I know all there is to know about that one now from Beelzebub.