Whipping my eggs so fast I end up cooking them

Dems in 2026 are gonna run on affordable access to the CSAM generating robot

I try to parse good and bad Christians but I often just want to throw out the baby and the bath water before nuking the bathroom and launching the ashes into space.

Damn, Gongino

There's no adults in the room. Just babies and monsters.

Is Andrew Tate's advice to young men about working out something like "if you get a good physique, people will focus less on your face"? Because it looks like that's what it would be.

If you've never lived in poverty, I don't care what you have to say about the economy. Period.

I am so sick of these authoritarian toddlers who have never been told "no" in their lives

Body dysmorphia is cool because you can lose over 40 lbs but then look in the mirror and only see what you haven't lost

If you don't see Dems as complicit in everything Trump is doing, I just don't trust you to observe and understand reality as it exists. You view the world as something entirely different from what it is and I don't argue with people from alternate dimensions.

They're sick of even pretending to argue with their dinner party pals

Is Andrew Tate's advice to young men about working out something like "if you get a good physique, people will focus less on your face"? Because it looks like that's what it would be.

I am very happy that the effort to make Charlie a posthumous hero flopped so hard that now all anyone can do is shit all over his widow

Jumped up my situps and pushups too. New year, new beast. Let's go.

A few months ago, I was struggling through 5 minutes before collapsing to the ground, laying there like a slug until I could move again. This morning I bumped up to 15 minutes and did it without gassing. Hard work pays off.

There's just too much of the US. I'd kill for an average European country length. It would make... Things... So much easier.

A really stupid situation I've found myself in a few times is being on the verge of a physical altercation due to not sharing some dipshit's crappy taste in music

Out of shape. Really just pretending to be a tough guy. Garnering the admiration and respect of wannabe tough guys everywhere. Holy crap. John Wayne is the first right wing influencer.

It's really no more complicated than "Voting Democrat makes you a good person, and not doing it makes you a bad person." They can't accept a world with more complex morality, so they don't.

I promise I hate Republicans just as much as I hate Democrats. The latter is just really into betraying causes I care about while the former is expectedly evil. I think you'll find I hate rich people no matter where they are, ultimately.

I can be shockingly mean to rubes but it's just far too late in the game to be buying into imperialist propaganda

At least it's pretty funny to watch all the Serious Centrist Adults In The Room try and justify a doddering old man's misfiring synapse manifesting as military action

I'll never forget the time I was called a f**got for condemning date rape... BY A WOMAN! God truly blessed the suburbs.

Liberal trailing off while explaining when deposing elected leaders is okay: When they're *cough cough* brown. *cough*

Like I was saying, we don't have an opposition party

If you think you know a guy with a low tolerance for tediousness and pedantry, wait until you meet me buddy

The English are jumping out in front as the most pathetic nation refusing to condemn illegal actions committed by the US.

"Lifelong Democrat" always cracks me up. A commitment to a ship should end when it starts sinking. Otherwise your life long lived for it ends at the bottom of the sea.

(liberal voice) "I'm not speaking cynically in bad faith! I'm just very gullible and stupid!"

If someone insists you condemn Maduro before criticizing Trump, why do you assume good faith on their part?

Now that is a cool moon picture

"Now firstly Maduro is a brutal dictator and-"

Democrats don't oppose Trump on the border. They don't oppose him on Israel. They've already expressed support for regime change in Venezuela. They will back him on this. We don't have an opposition party and it infuriates me to no end.

Adam Schwarz blocked me because he's a stupid imperialistic liberal fuck who will never be worth having by your side in any sort of resistance to the current fascism. Many such cases.

I'm sure liberals are excited about this. They never oppose him on any grounds that actually matter.

Returned Jesus Christ to baffled onlookers: "Are y'all ready to fuck the pain away?"

Being able to wear slutty shorts in November is weird but January? Now that's worrying.

Me reading the things some of you guys share with the whole ass Internet

Placing my hand on Converge's Jane Doe as I recite the oath of office

People should have unending scorn for an administrative state shirking all its duties to function as a money laundering service for billionaires. If those working within that state receive only insults, they should count themselves lucky.

Rube: "Now we've all had our shoes, watches and wallets stolen by insidious, self styled 'inspectors' of such items, however...."

It's not that everyone likes the CSAM creating robot. It's that the guys who do are like one or two connections away from the actual president. Also AI support is unquestionably bipartisan so there's that too.

In Italy they call them jpeggios

Liberal "anti-racism" is just not openly saying what you think and believe to be true about marginalized peoples

So many things are unmanly according to self styled authorities on masculinity but one thing that strangely never is: backing it up and dropping it on the lap of a billionaire. Just bouncing those cheeks on his weird dick over and over. This is perfectly fine and manly.

I live in Texas and I bet there's laws here protecting data thieves, if anything

Returned Jesus Christ to baffled onlookers: "Are y'all ready to fuck the pain away?"

Mel Gibson and Vince Vaughn get plenty of work as outspoken conservatives. Rob Schneider's problem is being Rob Schneider.

Holy Roman Empire, Batman

Fuck guillotines. Get the fires lit.