If I wanted to watch random people I don't care about engage in illegal dog fights in the woods, I'd just watch that instead!

Because every little thing, is gonna be alright! ...when you're being evicted.

Why haven't we been nuked yet?

Because in Bear's Big Blue House, YOU WORK FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY

What a great reward! DEATH!

Halo isn't a difficult game at all. You wanna know what's really tough? SpongeBob.

You keep yourself healthy by murdering smaller creatures that have no ways of fighting back, just like in real life.

Oh no! My nagging wife just got captured by a human grandfather clock!

Why haven't we been nuked yet?

That's foam, not a phone.

So we dodge the shark for a while, unable to decide which fish I'm supposed to be scared of.

This is a 7+ game with child beating!

Do kids really like this face? Or the inside flesh of a squirrel's cheeks?

Oh look, Shrek has something to tell me. What's that? Oh great! I WW

Say hello to Captain Bermuda Triangle!

Welcome to my Arabian toilet!

The wheels on the bus go round and round, all day long... cause someone cut the brakes

Game Theory: My Villager Has a Wang

If you know anything about me, I may not be stubborn... but I am extremely stubborn.

Oh look, Shrek has something to tell me. What's that? Oh great! I WW

Joy to the world! I did a CUM

I have been desperate for years to jump into my PS1 and have an affair with Bob the Builder's wife!

If you know anything about me, I may not be stubborn... but I am extremely stubborn.

My peepee got confused and it fell off!

YES! Daniel's in this game! Text-to-speech Daniel!

Yeah, give me the wheel, lady! I feel like drinking the BODILY NECTAR FROM MY ENEMY

UNEXPECTED EXPLOSION

Get outta there, Tomb Raider, Shrek's got some treasure to find!

PlayStation: Scapegoating for shitty parents since 1994

Can I pay you in screws?

You know that Lara Croft? The millionaire explorer with handguns and a mysterious family history? I know how to make her character more meaningful! GIVE HER A TUMOR!

Bling bling in my ding ding.

The wheels on the bus go round and round, all day long... cause someone cut the brakes

Is that feeling déjà vu... or have I eaten too many olives again?

This game opens up with you sucking farts out of a pig.

English! Too much hard for you? Go on school!

Oh don't worry Elastigirl, I know what's on the other side... YOUR HUSBAND'S DECONSTRUCTED FACE.

YES! Daniel's in this game! Text-to-speech Daniel!

It's Get Fit with Chicken Thighs!

I didn't know that Ronald Reagan was a double D cup!

All the computer players went to McDonald's and got the Lobotomy Combo Meal.

This game controls like urinary incontinence: it's just constantly freaking out and completely unable to hold itself.

I will personally ship myself over to your house and give you a kiss

I know beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but that doesn't apply if your head is the size of Saturn!

I'm sorry, everyone. I just... I haven't been this emotional since I saw Saving Ryan's Privates...

I have been desperate for years to jump into my PS1 and have an affair with Bob the Builder's wife!

Oh no! My nagging wife just got captured by a human grandfather clock!

It's the sequel to Oh: Oh No!

Thank you for putting an udder on my controller

Why can't I kill the innocent?!