“Being an adoptee under sealed records laws is like being placed in a permanent conservatorship. We are treated as perpetually incapable of handling information about ourselves.” #adoptee #adopteerights #humanrights #institutionalbetrayal #adoption open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...

You didn’t make bad decisions and wrong choices - the perpetrator did.

The correct term for a ‘late discovery adoptee’ is child abuse. #latediscoveryadoptee #childabuseawareness #itsabuse #adoption #adopteerights open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...

#adoption #adopteevoices #humanrights #adopteerights open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...

People constantly tell survivors they need to let go of the pain and move on but those same people will go on for hours about some rude thing done to them years ago. If someone’s telling you this they’re not trying to help you. They certainly aren’t respecting you and your pain.

People say they just want a baby and they don’t care how they get it - but it matters a lot to the human being gotten. #humanrights #adopteerights #childrights

If you start labeling adopted people’s trauma as a ‘mental illness’ - then you are harming them not helping them. #adopteevoices #traumainformed

“Survivors know all too well they are often on their own. What they need is real support, care, and community - not dismissive and insulting messages that only add to the weight they’re already carrying.” #SupportSurvivors #healing #RespectSurvivors open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...

Whenever someone says, “she relinquished her child for adoption because she couldn’t give the child the life they deserved” what they’re really saying is this mother and child were failed by society and the systems that should’ve been there to help them. #wefailedyou #adoption #adopteevoices

People tell adoptees that blood doesn’t matter but those same people get a DNA test for their dog. #imatter #adopteevoices #adoption #adopteerights

When I woke up 2 years ago I had no idea I would talk to a family member for the first time that day and it would be the start of my life completely changing. My whole life I had no information and in a couple of weeks I had everything. Making adoptees search is cruel. #adopteevoices

If mothers in a crisis got half the support adopters get…

When they say “Let’s talk about your part in the abuse” Say, “No, let’s talk about your part in victim blaming me.” #notyourfault open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...

I’m finding that so many adopters are very narcissistic. They come into adoptee comments to say what a ‘good’ adopter they are and get others to praise them. 🙄 #listentoadoptees #adopteevoices

People are made to search for their families after some horrible event like an abduction or disappearance - you don’t do this to someone on purpose. #adoption #adoptionistrauma #adopteerights #humanrights #itsabuse

#adoption #adopteevoices #SilentNoMore #adoptionistrauma #adopteerights open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...

Want to help adoptees today? Here is something you can do in about 15 minutes. Thank you very much. 🥚💙 #adopteerights #iwantmyobc

#adoption #adopteerights #humanrights #adopteevoices #institutionalbetrayal open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...

So many adoptees say their adoptive parents loved them but then describe horrible abuse. Understanding coercive control has helped many people realize they are being abused or grew up with abusive parents. It’s time for this understanding to extend to adoptees in adoptive homes. #adopteevoices

‘Walking on eggshells’ is a major sign of someone being abused. Adoptees, if this sounds familiar to you when dealing with your adoptive family and you searching or even talking about finding your family - that’s abuse. #coercivecontrol #adopteevoices #adoption

Adoptees have done our own social experiment. Go into our posts explaining our trauma and you will see the vile comments by adopters and adoption supporters - showing exactly who should not be caring for a child and why this billion dollar industry is not really about child welfare. #adopteevoices

“Denying adoptees access to their own birth certificates sends a clear message: Your identity belongs to the state. Your history is not yours. Your truth is inconvenient. That is not protection. That is control.” #adopteerights #adoption #humanrights open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...

An estranged mom came into my comments saying her estrangement was similar to adoption but at least I was chosen and I didn’t have any right to my information. Please know that when there is an estrangement there’s a good reason for it and who plays the victim? Abusers.

Legally separating a child from their family, their identity, their medical information and sealing those records, replacing that information with false information, then sealing all of that is the opposite of caring for a child - it’s abuse #adopteerights open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...

If adoptees got half the support adopters get… #adopteevoices #listentoadoptees

Nothing gets more nasty comments than saying children don’t lie about abuse or that adoption is trauma. #believesurvivors #listentosurvivors

My state erased my mother’s name from my birth certificate and put in another woman’s name as if she had given birth to me. They erased my father’s name and put in another man’s name as if his DNA created me. This allowed me to be lied to my entire life. #adopteerights #adoption

For adoptees, we literally don’t know information about our own selves but other people know this information - that’s cruel. It’s abuse. #adopteerights

Being adopted is like being put in the witness protection program and your identity erased except everyone else knows who you are - it’s you it’s hidden from. #adopteevoices #adoption

When you really think about it, it’s just absurd that anyone would not have the right to information about themselves. #adopteerights #humanrights

The California legislature is trying to make the very women harmed by the system as their scapegoats to keep harming. #obc #adopteerights #sealedrecords #adoptionsurvivors

Who gatekeeps information about you? Abusers. #adoption #adopteerights #adopteevoices #coercivecontrol

We’ve set the bar so low for adoptees that them being given information about themselves is seen as a gift - it’s not. It’s the literal bare minimum you can offer them and should have never been taken. Ever. #adoptees

That adoptees have to fight for the right to know themselves - to know what makes up their own body - is absurd. Listen to the people arguing this. It’s absurd. The question isn’t should we be ‘allowed’ to know - the question is why were these rights ever taken away. #adopteerights

Let’s take away people’s basic human rights then make them feel grateful for it so they are the ones defending it. #adoption #adopteevoices #fog

My father I just met obtained my adoption file so I have the relinquishment paper my mother signed and it doesn’t mention confidentiality at all. So the very paperwork the system is trying to keep from us is what proves they are keeping it under false pretenses. #adopteerights #adoption

We’ve set the bar so low for what ‘supporting a survivor’ means that literally just saying ‘I don’t think you’re lying’ is seen as a gift. Survivors deserve so much more than that.

It’s time for a reckoning for all the adoptees that had our human rights violated by keeping what makes up our very bodies a secret from us but something others have the right to know. It’s the most unthinkable violation that people have the audacity to call ‘beautiful’. #adoptee

The only reason I would need someone else’s permission to get a birth certificate is if I’m asking for their birth certificate. Adoptees in California are not asking for someone else’s birth certificate. We are asking for OUR own birth certificate. It’s ours. It belongs to us. #adopteerights

If anyone feels the need today to say “but it’s your family” they should make sure they’re saying it to the abusive family member - not the one harmed. #fathersdaytrauma

If you’ve always spent today walking on eggshells trying to make it a perfect day for someone else but now you don’t have to. Then today is your day. Spend the day making yourself happy. Enjoy it. #fathersdaytrauma

Child welfare means family preservation and support. Providing external care in the rare cases when it’s absolutely necessary - no where does it require changing a child’s identity, erasing their family, and falsifying their birth records - that’s abuse not care. #adoptiontrauma

Some of perpetrator’s favorite sayings: “It’s just a joke.” “I was joking!” “Can’t you take a joke.” “You have no sense of humor.” “You’re so sensitive - it was a joke.” #perpetrator101

When each of my children were born, I was prevented from giving them the most basic thing a mother can give them - their identity. Each of my children were born without their right to their identity. Adoption and sealed records are generational trauma. #adoption #humanrights

After meeting my family at 59, looking at pictures of myself throughout my life finally makes sense. It really hurts that people think I didn’t have the right to that my whole life and that California is still fighting to keep my personal records closed and sealed. #adopteevoices

Everyone wants to talk about trauma but not about the perpetrators causing the trauma. In fact, in most instances you’d never even know a perpetrator was involved because they’re never mentioned.

Survivors deserve compassion. Abusers deserve accountability.

Women’s rights are adoptee’s rights. Many women are adoptees and have the right to make reproductive choices based on the their accurate and up to date medical information and genetics - and so do our adult daughters. #womensrights #adopteerights open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...

Why are adoptees speaking out? Because we are angry that our mothers were told they weren’t good enough for us so we were given to strangers. #adopteevoices

Read here open.substack.com/pub/defendsu...