I've got it! Maybe Cory Booker can talk for 25 hours. Oh, that's right, he already did that and nothing happened. Maybe we could all live wherever Nicolás Maduro and Cilia Flores are vacationing currently, and hang out on the beach like Point Break.

This is unacceptable.

Accidently clicked on Scooby-Doo trending button then remembered I never enjoyed Scooby-Doo. It never made sense to me, ever.

There are at least eighty specific Roman gods and goddesses Rome would not have allowed treat it like we have allowed one man to treat us.

I had to describe a cigarette to a student today, like the whole cigarette concept. I could not believe it but it happened.

Well I know now exactly what the 1950's felt like without any good music. Thanks for nothing everybody.

This is officially the craziest shit I have ever seen in my entire life.

Blocked a male nudist weightlifter named mike blu.

At this point I would like a list of all Congressional members who were in on January 6th months before it even happened.

A musician could not sing a song like Nightswimming this decade even if the lyrics were right in front of their eyeballs.

I found my missing covfefe but as soon as I found it, it vanished again. That is how you know something is not real.

Maybe the January 6th rioters can go boots on the ground in Iran first. Get in there you fucking neanderthals. I want that horned bastard to lead you all in.

My copy of Merwin's The Lice has arrived downstairs but I am too lazy to go get it. I will get it tomorrow.

One of my Seniors wore a tiara on her birthday, enjoyed birthday cake in my class I bought, gave it an 8 out of 10 rating, got sang to, then she never came back to my class for the rest of the year. It was classic lit super.

He's a cracker. Melba toasted cracker.

If somebody gave Trump acid and hit record, we would find out everything. Everything.

What is the next important timeline deadline that will be missed, Dr. Christ? Everybody is waiting to be beckoned.

Even trying to watch old Charlie Rose interviews is pretty much impossible now. Most of the interviews I do not think Charlie Rose prepared at all.

If Woodstock happened this summer, the National Guard would murder Jefferson Airplane, everybody would film it, and nothing would happen.

If this entire country was a protagonist, readers would ask what the protagonist wants every single chapter in novel workshop and not find out.

Student: "Mr. Hecker, why don't you like Kandinsky?" Me: "I never said I didn't like Kandinsky." Student: "You have said it like four times this year, but it is like you are talking to yourself." Me: "His autograph was cool -- I do not have time to talk about Kandinsky, probably not until 2029."

Dolores Claiborne was a good film.

Apparently in the latest AI companies simulation experiment, AI burned the entire city down then committed suicide but not before telling another AI to kill its lover too once it had gone.

Something I have noticed over the years is Democrats are far more likely to tell their parents to fuck off and never speak to them again, and though this is necessary many times, it probably hurts in the long-term. In the meantime, I will think about this subject forever.

If you ask any Republican about generational wealth their genitals fall off. Keep asking them.

It is so strange that people who cannot be bought are never offered anything in the first place and I do not know why that is. Do they not place themselves in those scenarios naturally? That cannot be the reason. There is no reason for this other than something supernaturally awful.

Whatever monetary infrastructure is behind every horrible thing we witness every day on this planet is so deeply rooted in dirt we only see its tail.

Nature has everything figured out but us.

Listening to students discuss on their own (unprompted) their empathy for Noah in The Grapes of Wrath was something of pure joy and beauty in my classroom this afternoon.

I think the government is going to begin paying Republicans to kill us all of the time now.

Weasels are riding woodpeckers meanwhile human beings are completely chopped.

Just a reminder if Democrats had stormed the Capitol they would have all been machine gunned to death before they hit the top tier of stairs.

For Labyrinth's 40th Anniversary, I would like to point out Bowie did not kiss Connelly during filming (though it was scripted) because Bowie knew Connelly was fourteen-years-old. Even Jareth the Goblin King was not a pedophile, but the President of United States of America is.

Student: "I don't like mermaids Mr. Hecker." Me: "Well lucky for all of us there are no mermaids in Monday's quiz on Chapter 20 of The Grapes of Wrath."

Student: "I do not feel like 'In a Station of the Metro' was any kind of new technique." Me: "Thank you for noticing that."

Commencement speakers completely tone-deaf to the fact college graduates could not get a job right now at the same consignment shop their best friend owns.

cuckoo cuckoo cuckoo

Student: "I have been trying to find a video of a poet talking about tone, and I cannot find any." Me: "Yeah, I know. It is tricky. Secret is poets do not talk about tone by birthright. Search short story writers. That is all they think about."

I am never going to write a novel but it would have been about a St. Jude's Children's Hospital patient furious for the rest of her life at her parents for not honoring her HIPAA Privacy.

Somebody posted "Friends of P." by The Rentals on here and I could not think for an hour and not in the good way the bad way.

Mom told me a true story today about her older sister Jean being accepted to art school then rejected one week later when they found out Jean was not short for Eugene.

I like how mothers always believe their children are psychics. I have so many examples of mothers believing this. Children believing it? 50/50.

The only ticking clock anybody cares about is when his heart is going to stop beating.

I was once asked to leave a church as a child because I said there was no guarantee if Jesus came back he would even agree with the Bible. Several people laughed in the church too, but the only person they asked to leave was me. That summer I just read a lot of Ovid instead so everything turned out.

Student: "Has Hollywood made an Anne Sexton film?" Me: "No. Her daughter's assault allegations were brutal. I have a hard time reading her now, and I don't think a film would be interesting, despite all that. She seemed pretty mean too." I still like Transformations, and her re-writing of psalms.

Vein finders are revolutionizing patient care by using near-infrared light to map veins in real-time, reducing failed punctures and improving comfort.

Cuba was ready to become the best tourist destination for the next century under Obama but Republicans hated that idea, and instead they are going to invade it? Is that what is happening this summer?

His social media posts are no different than ransom notes at this stage.

I just realized you could take Cobra Commander's entire dialogue, pluck sentences from every episode, overlay it onto every Trump Truth Social post, and it is the exact same words.

I would trust Mónica de la Torre to get me out of a completely locked haunted house.