“Anti ICE” scribbled onto a single round is the exact kind of evidence a podcaster would plant to ensure something fits their preordained narrative.

Reports are Lindsey from State Farm is preparing to indict former FBI Director Comey. The failed insurance lawyer’s choice for her first ever prosecutorial endeavor should be fun to follow.

“The Ukraine war has no effect on us because, as you know, there’s a big ocean in between us.” - Dear Leader being geographical.

“What we need to do is either leave the U.N. or b*mb it.” - Jesse Watters So when will Fox fire him for promoting violence on air? Or for misinformation since it was a Trump aide who stopped the escalator? 🤷‍♂️

Interesting. The maga horde are trying to claim that Kimmel was not censored but here’s Dear Leader admitting he put pressure on the network and is going to try to extort them for not acquiescing. Sounds like a violation of the constitution to me.

Dear Leader’s UN speech, in massive font with all cap key words and no multisyllabic phrases, is a master class in delusional gaslighting wrapped up in belligerence and empty confidence. Grocery prices are not down. Energy prices are spiking. The $17t is puerile fantasy.

Dear Leader’s nonsensically bellicose and belligerent tirade at the UN yesterday was likely the most embarrassing presidential display since *checks notes* his unhinged and delusional tylenol rant the day before. 😆

An app created to tattle on people not being sufficiently mournful about Charlie has been taken down after… leaking the personal data of the fragile little snitches. 😆

Bible Spice Press Secretary is angrily threatening an investigation of the United Nations after the escalator abruptly stopped as Dear Leader stepped onto it. Except, it turns out, the malfunction was caused by White House aides messing with the controls. 🤷‍♂️

“Who are you with?” - Dear Leader “NPR” - Reporter “You’re still here? Won’t be for long. Does antifa have anything to do with your network?” - leans in ominously and lets the implied threat hang in the air.

Jimmy Kimmel returns to TV tonight and the maga horde are trying to claim it as proof Dear Leader didn’t try to censor him. Which is weird considering he had his FCC stooge bragged about it. They just simply didn’t do a good job of silencing him.

“There’s a rumor, and I don’t know if it’s so or not, that Cuba, they don’t have tylenol because they don’t have the money for tylenol and they have essentially no autism.” - Dear Leader letting his imagination wander. Cuba has a slightly higher rate of autism than the US.

“I’m really good at this. Your countries are going to h*ll.” - Dear Leader addresses the United Nations. The laughter was palpable.

Antifa should rebrand as acetaminophen since Dear Leader clearly can’t pronounce it. 🤷‍♂️

“We have a lot of information. That information, it’s information that we have that we are making these statements and making them out front and I’m making them loudly and strongly.” - Deep Thoughts with Dear Leader Narrator: wut?

“We stopped the conflict between Cambodia and Armenia, it was just starting and it was a bad one.” - Dear Leader claiming victory in another nonexistent war.

Dear Leader has installed a new US Attorney to persecute his perceived enemies. Lindsey will be moving from the Smithsonian, where she hunted for “improper ideology” and, despite having no prosecutorial or investigative experience, is sure to look good on camera.

Make America Redline Again! Dear Leader’s minions at HUD have stopped enforcement of the Fair Housing Act. Because all those lawsuits he lost for housing discrimination in the 80’s and 90’s weren’t unfounded…

For every season… Whatever. 🤷‍♂️

“Good Job!” “Great Debate!” Observers noticed Podcaster Krash taking extensive notes during his train wreck testimony. Analysis shows he wasn’t making notes for follow-up, he was writing himself affirmations while flailing about miserably. 😂

Charlie Wessel would’ve been proud of that bombastic, WWE produced griefgasm. Complete with pyrotechnics, concessions and merch, self promotion and histrionic fear mongering. They almost remembered to mention him too. Kind of.

At the height of the griefgasm for Charlie, Dear Leader crowed about revealing the cause of autism on Monday - tylenol. That’s based on a “study” that’s been repeatedly thrown out of federal court for having “zero scientific merit.” 🤷‍♂️

I don’t recall anyone ever needing to put MLK quotes “into context.” 🤷‍♂️

“We look at it as a time of healing, a time of whatever.” - Dear Leader eulogizes Charlie.

Elon is attending ol’ Charlie’s performative griefgasm but clearly isn’t interested in rubbing elbows with any of them.

The Soviets built Bagram in the 1950’s and Trump is still in the Epstein files. 🤷‍♂️

Dear Leader - “And that’s why I sued the NYTimes for a lot of money.” Reporter - “A judge threw that case out.” Dear Leader - “I’m winning. I’m winning the cases.” Narrator- “He’s not winning anything, especially his battle with reality.”

Conservative influencers are mourning Charlie in the best way they know how, by harassing Starbucks baristas. One went viral for posting how they wrote “loser” on his cup. Except footage revealed he wrote it himself in an amazing self own.

Dear Leader, seen here clearly not stumbling up a staircase, has claimed for the second time in a month to have ended the conflict between Albania and Azerbaijan. Two countries that have never been in conflict and please don’t ask him to try to say Azerbaijan again…

Podcaster Krash has directed his stooges to drop an investigation into BorderCzar Tom Höss who had been recorded by actual FBI agents accepting $50k in cash in exchange for future government contracts. Because bribery is maga.

Plastered Pete has notified all journalists covering the Pentagon that all stories “must be approved for public release by an appropriate authorizing official before publication.” Which sounds like a directive from Pyongyang.

Six minutes before the scheduled airtime last night, Sinclair pulled their tribute beatifying ol’ Charlie and relegated it to their YouTube channel.

“We’re talking to Afghanistan. It should’ve never been given up.” - Dear Leader expressing his desire to retake Bagram, forgetting he made the deal to surrender after negotiating directly with the Taliban instead of the Afghani government. The Taliban has rejected his request.

“There will always be relative price changes.” - newly minted Fed Stooge Miran when asked about surging consumer prices for coffee, fresh produce, and beef.

“I don’t know him actually.” - Dear Leader responding to a question about the U.K. ambassador recently fired for his ties to Epstein.

You think Dear Leader’s jobs numbers were bad? Wait, there’s more! After market close the BLS quietly announced that inflation data, due to be released on Tuesday, will be delayed indefinitely. That suggests a catastrophically bad report. 🤷‍♂️

Dear Leader’s $15b lawsuit against the NYTimes has been dismissed in record time with the judge calling the legal filing - “decidedly improper” As usual, his legal team clearly got their degrees from a cereal box offer.

Many maga are claiming that Obama used the pressure of his office and the FCC to get Rosanne cancelled just like Trump did to Kimmel. Except Obama wasn’t president in 2018. Care to guess who was?

Jerome Powell has the numbers and assessment of Dear Leader’s economic performance: -fewer jobs -slower GDP growth -higher inflation Everyone, get ready for that 1970’s favorite - stagflation!

I’m just saying, my life in high school would’ve been so much easier if dad could’ve appointed the girl I was done with to the ambassadorship of Greece. 🇬🇷

Rudy Giuliani, shown here actively decaying, has been ordered to pay $1.4m by a judge to his lawyers for all the mischief he got himself into on Dear Leader’s behalf. Think he’ll ever get rewarded for his loyalty? 😂

“We’re gunna reducing drug costs over the next year and a half by 1000%!” - Dear Leader not mathing the math.

Podcaster Krash bungling a question about Dylann Roof before sheepishly admitting that he’s unfamiliar with the case is clear evidence that he’s unfit and unqualified.

Dear Leader is asserting that any media network that allows criticism of him may have their license revoked. Which is cribbed directly from the 1930’s German playbook.

A comprehensive report completed by the DoJ found conclusively that politically motivated violence is right wing by a massive margin - over 75%. Since that does not jibe with the current narrative being peddled, the report was deleted this week.

Alligator Alcatraz has been a model of Secretary Cosplay’s meticulous management skills. In just a few short months they have managed to lose over 1200 detainees, with families and attorneys left looking and ICE unable to provide answers beyond having them at some point…

In order to maintain a high caliber of standard and restore a “warrior’s ethos,” Plastered Pete has ordered the Pentagon to conduct a comprehensive review of… …grooming standards. Specifically targeting men’s facial hair for prohibition.

To be clear… Jimmy was not fired for anything he said about Charlie. Jimmy is being silenced by an increasingly desperate authoritarian regime too fragile to take criticism.

When Podcaster Krash was questioned about the attempt on Dear Leader in Butler last year, he replied that he could not comment until after the trial. Which is curious since the deceased rarely appear in court…