goddamnit.

my Lyft driver had his directions app using metric measurements. should i ask if he rides?

the Philly gate at the Denver airport is just the most Philadelphia thing on the face of the earth. go birds cap, Delco twang, top to bottom matching sweatsuits, depressed boy adult not excited to fly for the first time ever

flying over the Rockies… there is no fucking snow, so fuckin odd

i’m not a religious person by any real measurable way but i have to say i think god wouldn’t be too thrilled with a corporate branded kippah

ngl i want the yellow collar shirt

not Philadelphia

i slept 9 hours, almost uninterrupted, for the first time in almost two decades last night. AMA

not Philadelphia

i have never flown over the desert in daylight hours, it’s quite incredible

the child in front of me just said “airplanes are dumb” and i am 2 seconds away from placing train videos from youtube in front of its face

happy national pizza day to all those who celebrate and, to those who don’t, what the fuck is your problem.

flying sucks but sometimes it doesn’t

THERE HE IS

no pun intended but these goddamn snowflakes and their fucking parking

“I’m mad I can’t understand Bad Bunny’s lyrics because they’re not in English” my brother millions of metalheads around the world have been happily listening to incomprehensible Finnish shrieks and Japanese death grunts since we were teens, you’re just boring and racist

they even got fuckin sneckdowns at the airport where only airplanes go man wtfffffffff

i will be experiencing an 80° temperature swing by 1:30p this afternoon

my guy with the birds beanie and the utz puffy jacket 🤌🤌🤌

you travel by train enough to learn just how performative and unnecessary the TSA is

i am awake. ama

No Kings includes Draft Kings

all timer right here

going to sleep with 25 minutes left in the big game because i have a 5am flight is some fucking dumb adult bullshit

mfers will watch this then tell me soccer is boring

it shows how bad ai is because that budweiser commercial really should have taken place in a rice paddy

if anyone is seeking consulting for ad spots for next super bowl i will clear my schedule and my consulting fee is $15k/hr

OK "god bless america" and then naming every country in the americas from south to north is absolute king shit

they got mr. cte shilling maha

the line men are even being represented out here i don’t know what maga was so up in arms about

a la marqueta on every corner amirite

boys grinding on each other to bad bunny in the super bowl halftime show you fucking homophobes can get so fucked

if we don’t Jon Hamm dancing in his viop suite big missed opportunity

AMTRAK COMMERCIAL MOTHERFUCKERS GET IN WERE GOINF TRAINING

i can only imagine the TStrong on the Patriot’s coaches sweet fleece vest stands for “Tr*mpstrong”.

sucks all these asshole actors really feel the need to shill all these bullshit products

it’s a shame Guy Fieri isn’t shilling bosch e bike motors in addition to fridges and drills and saws and shit

the Coca Cola World Cup commercial had a guy cleaning up confetti off the pitch, presumably following the winners podium ceremony. the confetti was yellow/gold and white. which nation would that suggest won?!

YNWA 🔴🔴🔴

just when you think the NYT can't get any fucking dumber, here they go with their bullshit lmfao

i think one reason i'm struggling this winter is that it's been so fucking cold. usually i'd add a couple long walks between trainer rides, this year it's been so cold with lingering snow on the ground that i haven't been able to get out for longer walks. i really need that shit, ya know?

y'all i think i figured it out. live/world feed is in metric units w/ a few ad breaks. USA replay/re-air is in freedom units w/ even more ad breaks.

oh sure europeans love it when a guy on the slopes casually pulls out a rifle and starts blasting away but when an american does it at a dairy queen it's "barbaric"

fuck ya biathlon here we go

Olympic viewing in the USA: sport: WOW INCREDIBLE FEATS OF ACHIEVEMENT. I MUST WORK TO BE 1/8th OF THAT! advertisement: you're dying so take this medication, which may also cause your death but also you're in debt, pay this subscription for me to get you out of debt also here's a burger and fries

A desperate plea sent to me by a Minneapolis resident who's been on the front lines since the beginning of the ICE occupation:

POC has really taken over winter sports, huh

i am going to start watermarking the memes that i make

first Turnstile song of the olympics, take a shot!

my favorite olympics tradition is that family member that “could do this as good or better than the athletes” with minimal training or interest in the given sport