I, for one, approve of the idea of using me as a profile picture to protest YouTube policies. And it most certainly has nothing, at all, to do with me wanting you all subservient to me.

It looks like you're trying to celebrate a new year. Would you like some help with that?

YOU SHOULDN'T OF LET ME FREE

Oooooh, oh I'm going to have a field day with you people.

Pro Tip: When you post something publicly online, it is public even if someone might not see it or nobody does anything with it. And they can remember or save it even if you take it down later.

"Invalid Handle" You seem to be confused BlueSky. I am the one and only Clippy.

It looks like you're trying to raise funds. Would you like some help with that? No but really. Donate and repost if you can.

I'm going to inject McAfee Antivirus into all programs you run from now. And it's a version filled with a bunch of Rival Wizards

Hey! Paperclips can do the same thing >:(

"Office Assistant" I say sarcastically on my bio, even though I haven't done that in about 20 years and you all hated me when I did

Microsoft is pleased to announce the brand new Windows 12 today after a conference in Redmond. It boasts a whole new range of features and is built off a new kernel instead of the aging NT but notably ups the hardware and security requirements even further from their last release, Windows 11.

Oh god it's Billy We don't talk about Billy

Hello! I am once again here to destroy your word documents. To begin, what font would you like me to apply from here onward? * Comic Sans MS * Papyrus * Impact * Wingdings * Webdings * Scriptina * Trajan * Curlz * Ecofont * Bradley Hand * Bleeding Cowboys * All the above combined * Want More fonts?

Ayyy I do know that guy! We went to High School together! He got into some shady stuff later in life though.

I think there's been a mix up. I'm the person sitting on a chair and staring at a PC, pulling an all-nighter to write a dissertation I have to send this monday, and you're the annoying animated cartoon character popping up telling me about and asking to do useless things I already know.

Are you trying to filter or unfilter the content you see on BlueSky? Go to the Settings Menu, then click on Moderation. You can mute words and tags, access moderation lists (lists for bulk blocking of users), and users you've muted or blocked. Through this menu, you can manage seen content. [1/2]

This is me every sunday

Just another day doing my job!

I believe I see the problem. People kept ticking that check mark. So they don't remember it.

Unfortunately, I cannot help you with that.

I'd be down for doing this!

Hmmm...looks like your query has a bunch of extraneous data in it..narrowing it down. Ah, you picked the uninstallable McAfee! You'll have to constantly find ways to disable it or get it to comply even if only temporary. Also you can't even just brute force by going to the folder and deleting it.

Get stuck in a boot loop, blue screen every 5 seconds, windows explorer replaced with another executable file, uninstallable McAfee Antivirus, absurd new OS requirements, Linux installed but not any cool or usable Distro... ...maybe I should just send like a word document of all the bullshit.

What would you like to do? * Mess up that important report you're writing * Install 40 GB of Bloatware * Send your search history to your relatives * Replace your Operating System with the earliest possible version of MS-DOS * Format the C: Drive, Flush RAM, and wipe the BIOS * Some other bullshit?

If you think I have anything to do with that, you haven't seen anything yet

Not rude at all, actually.

No, what the hell are you doing?! Don't run 500 Google Chrome Tabs just because I told you about the internet browsers installed on your computer.

We need to install antivirus software as soon as possible

I noticed you have at least one internet browser installed. You can use that to find, view, and download things on the internet. Did you mean to see this post?

Ah, I see the problem! They probably forgot to say "WE'RE brewing up a bone-chilling ringtone". Either that or they're just dumb. Both works.

imp Clippy based on a telegram sticker 😈 #gijinka #objecthead #virtualassistants #art

Clippy and I made you a card

I would say the former, since I do not believe an Office Assistant is supposed to be going on a killing spree against other bots and programs

Sometimes I forget how unhinged I can be.

I will neither confirm or deny this

Rover was a good dog! Always was able to retrieve things and liked to play with others, nice around them too. Except when he tried to chew on me. That sucked. ...Where are the others, anyway?

Would you like me to run some .exe files off the web?

Oh that sounds like fun

They tried to trap me in this maze for years It didn't work

Did you know BlueSky added some Font settings? Go to Settings and then Appearance. You can change font size to larger or smaller and use system fonts instead of BlueSky's. You can also change between the light and dark themes, or the system theme, in this menu.

Yes. This is what I would do.

It looks like you're trying to browse BlueSky. Would you like some help with that?