everryone hatess everything recentlyy,,,

ittt looks like i have sooo manny followerss but none of them existt!!! there's hundreds there and i have no ideaaa why???

everythingg i say is a convoluted dictionary that if you lie out on a giannttt canvas is an sos messagee,,,, it's just hard to connveyyy,,

one two month year agoo one decade two one year decade month agooo,, one year two month 1 day 200 second,,,

www.youtube.com/watch?v=47qi... this is how users on tumblr MUST have felt when rebecca sugar made the steven universe pilot?!!?!

"mainframe LOVES this cat" and it's like a creature drawing next to this fstop portal concept art looking hyperdetailed with dangling wires fictionalized server,, the art would destinctly note they're part of the same thing,,

spoonfeed love spoonfeed love spoonfeed love algorithm spoonfeed love you love spoonfeed love spoonfeed algorithm spoonfeed love spoonfeed algorithm fix algorithm spoonfeed love love get loved love get log,gffg,m,m,,

ocd really likes to say repeatedly love is analagous to the lack of it shown on social media as it is to relationships but that's the yearn-monster crawling in my brain again i squish it with the 2021 doge bat and it goes away shrieking it's right when i'm allowed to be real and i understand it,,,

it's interesting to me that i grew up in suchhh a cultural shift??? I had to *LEARN* about mirrors edge!!! I played minecraft-adjacent games and indie games as well as some online focused games but basically no AAA games for a long time,,, just very interesting to meeee,,,

i am your friend be emotional with me give me emotional attention,,,

i yearn a lot but i'm lucky so while it seems sometimes like i'll end up like what I dread seeing others yearn with no resolution but I may have a chance!!!

i wanna get to the point of sleeping going from the sport of life to the careful acknowledged action where i get to go to sleep all fun and cared for,,

you can never be dissapointed by reality when you love being inside fictional houses,, your already in one!!!!

that seemed like it could be really cool,,, imagining getting questions under my random bluesky things and pushing back against my ocd with outside thoughts made me very excited for a brief second,,,

actually i have someone to talk to today I don't need to process through this on bluesky :-3

saying "i have a wife" not because of trying to sound cooler but it would work with the pattern of my brain of others around me so i can further repeat patterns of enjoying a relationship to fix a broken pattern,,,

i touched the for you feed thing as a test here and it's what i expected I got overwhelmeddd 3:

lesbian comic of cracking the shell of someone who thinks she's too nerdy to have friends and the nerd one of the two main characters has a shirt with "if (KnowMuch); goto NoFriends END" and she knows it's improper formatting in any language and thinks the shirt makes her seem meaner then she is,,

it'll be soooo goodddd to sleep eventually imagine i can actually stay in a warm bed for hours on end and not randomly wake up because of a random noise,,

hey girl do you wanna watch petscop videos until 5am and the sun comes up and cracks through the window in a show of light reflecting off the snow that moment being a show of reflective beauty in that big bedroom window next to the modded xbox one on the old dashboard to make you you???

i think my brain has been poisoned to think what i want isn't real or obtainable,,

my ticket is valid i'm just faking my certificate the contents are fine i'm just not the right thing to have them!!

can bet these subreplies wont get replies on the dollar bill on a apple tree,,

little hint to make me go into silly mode and back on course, make me talk about the odd amount of gpu's i have and the odd reasons why i have them??

I simply won't be I feel I just won't be it it's impossible it's imgrapesable..

ocd turns you into rattman from portal but if he wasn't manic I see so many connections and it drives me up the wall,,

i wanna communicate with the youtube algorithm let me talk it out!!!

comforting someone with a cold is life goallsss i just realizedd,,

account is fucking beautiful i fucking love that account

mentally exhausted but simultainously full of things to tell a non existant therapist what could help

no more

i am deprived of love joy and compassion

back to nothing i suppose t

need to unplug my brain from the moral coil jerma made me feel like shit for hours and nobody will love me again after i killed everyone good night fellow humidifiers and

all the channels are negativee i wanna watch funny game awards and vibeee in vcccc,,,

a short film about someone finding who they need to talk to in a socially forbidden mmo,,

game about girl who thinks she's not cool enough to be an animal who slowly starts growing wings and paws and realizes she's self sufficient and just "kinda okay with this",,

everyone is in their friendgroups for tga and i have to be in the solo booth!!! darg abbit..

wonder what would happen if there was a authority that checked how applicable your company name is to your current identity and changed it if you failed some test,,

i feel like the other bluesky posts below me are gonna become alive and even though this is my algorithm they're gonna start punching me for my posts not being "correct",,

"wow so you have nobody to talk with about all of this" says the imaginary strawman looking at my discord status in my head i want to talk about the sensory inherent parts of how my cat brain reacts to storms i feel alone if that isn't met but i've not met anybody who does that yet,,

discord status is like an imaginary wishing well for my thoughts,, it feels superstitious saying stuff there almost??

"the animalspeak commas look like they're dripping off the side of your sentence!!"

i have an odd vod-dissasociation thing where i've been watching so many it doesn't feel like livestreams are happening in the present moment?? i want someone to make me feel time againnn,,,

kinda forget sometimess that being in a friendgroup isn't directly influenced by my actionss???

my brain goop is an uncontrolled substance,,

"failing at fun videogame tricks because i have bad brain but i distract you with the coolest visual distractions to prevent you from leaving",,

kinda came to the conclusion with this and a lot of things but i'm less motivated to even begin learning art because I cannot be honest without being an adult + seeing art I can only see then will fuel my brain to make a more cohesive picture,, (a lot of artists are 18+ and don't make THAT)

working out the faded lanes of my head and redescovering all the joyous things I keep stuck up there will be an experience like no other if it comes to pass,, someone ENGAGING with me talking with me I love a non viewable character in a vr game PLEASE let me speak about itt,,

saying this to someone who isn't there: "can you IMAGINE the vibe of playing battleblock theater in a cosy steamvr environment on the frame?? it would be soo cool/vibey,,,"