need the nearest rabbi to hop into the discord vc and help me and the girls figure out which monsters from dungeon meshi are kosher

how do i not own a crockpot what is wrong with me

we don't talk enough about how hot it is to stand completely nude in front of your fully clothed domme while she struggles to keep her cool

i can't swallow pills without choking so i blend my adderall and other meds and mix it into what becomes an awful tasting cup of applesauce. i call it mech pilot slurry and i can't function without it

*eyes turn black* in 2028 an american studio will produce a live action Hatsune Miku movie with the same energy as the Barbie movie and will include a Brazilian Miku cameo. Chris Pratt will be in it

i think to be allowed to call yourself a dom/me you should do a one year internship as a submissive. earn your domming license after you've spent some time as a footstool or someone's pet or impact bottom or idk i made myself horny i forgot where i was going with this sorry

why are you as a red blooded lesbian not grabbing my hips rn

absolutely banger game and if you're reading this you know what to do

1000xRESIST is a brilliant game that dares to ask: what if God had a cluster B personality disorder

hi

the other night woke up in a cold sweat, uttered "john gaius is just princess bubblegum with boy autism and a reddit account" then passed back out, much to the confusion of my partner

the adult version of the stanford marshmallow experiment is saving half of your sandwich for later and fighting the urge to eat it right away

you're losing chess to a dog i'm falling for the wheel of fortune in balatro every single time we are not the same

"all art is political" i whisper to myself as i watch the PoV character of an 18+ visual novel treat women with kindness and respect

first ass shot of 2024 vs last ass shot of 2024

cause: my partner wouldn't stop cuddling me so i could go to the bathroom and said "just piss in a bottle" effect: jeff bezos omorashi fetish roleplay

in my language we don't say "hi how are you?" we say "goddamn bitch, did your tits get bigger?" and i think that's beautiful

just finished reading Nona the Ninth and all i have to say is bible fanfiction is so cool i wish catholics were real

the cavalier/necromancer dynamic in the locked tomb series is just butch/femme for gay space wizards

how is it almost 2025 and procreate still doesn't have a simple way to turn anti-aliasing off

is bushwick just the ohio meme for edgy queers who like drugs and unprotected sex or am i misreading the room

"oh god i'm becoming my mother 😭" but instead of perpetuating generational trauma i'm just gaining her love for crossword puzzles

folks always talk about how they wish they transitioned earlier bc "wrong puberty" and all that, but if i transitioned earlier the lack of dysphoria taking up space in my brain would've allowed me to attempt the med school gauntlet

⚠️ new scarf alert ⚠️

"tits or ass?" *tarantino voice* bro, her soles

i'm a normal well adjusted person with no sexual trauma, as long as you don't look at my r/GWASapphic listening history

what if we kissed by the pink sign at the techno rave

*lustfully* baby can i perform a vivisection on you 🥺

in 2025 we will all find jugglers irresistibly sexy. juggling will get you laid. toss some balls around and you get to hit

go ahead, send me to the convent -- i'll come back pregnant

first date idea: we hold hands and succumb to the darkness that resides within all of us together

baby i know i'm a flesh automaton abandoned by a jaded god but that just means i give reeeaally good head

if the world were just and fair you'd put me in a starter pack

is there anyone who who will pay me money to regularly text them shit like "i don't really care for deep dish pizza" and "she sarah on my jessica until i parker"

the other night i was talking to a guy about the wood polishing technique he uses on handles of his handmade floggers and people kept walking up to me to tell me how hot i looked and i was just like thanks but you're interrupting our autism to autism communication please leave

just took my lock the fuck in pill (adderall) and i can't wait to hyperfocus in 30 minutes on the WRONG FUCKING THING

humanity is doomed unless we evolve beyond the need to piss

someone touched my skin and said it felt like perfect silicone. astute observation! i am an android

this body is machine that turns she/theys into he/theys

jesus can turn water into wine but cam he turn my jokes into funny jokes

lesbian who misses her gf so much that she gives herself a lobotomy over it

craving some ethically and sustainably sourced, farm-to-table pussy

white paper proposal: soaking for BYU students who like feet

i call myself a submissive top but i think using top/bottom as analogues for penetrator/penetrated causes us to lose a lot of nuance in sexual dynamics bc while i'm doing the penetrating i'm definitely not the top

oh don't mind me, i'm just checking to see how much of your throat i can fit in my mouth in case i ever succumb to the cannibalistic urges that befall every femme lesbian

as a black trans woman, healing your relationship with your mother looks like her going from forcing you to keep a buzzcut your entire childhood to her sending you money for hair appointments.

oh you know what they say -- spare the rod, spoil the the puppygirl

"i'm a top" "i'm a bottom" i'm wanted for 32 counts of arson and criminal mischief

i'm just gonna mirror my twitter posts here for a while and maybe on occasion post a few a few bluesky exclisives

some submissives need to see your dom(me)s as people who also have needs and also require aftercare and not just sex toys whose feelings don't matter. reciprocity for dominants please