I'm getting greedy, no good... I hope someone will list one of my fics as their favourite for whatever reason... mood, characterisation, whatever. Something they like to come back to over and over again... but that means I need to become a writer who can make works like that in the first place.

T/Gen Character(s): Hakuri Tag(s): Pre-Canon, Character Study, Angst and Humour, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Minor Original Character(s) Summary: ...Hakuri does his best to figure out the basics of survival in a world he knows almost nothing about. archiveofourown.org/collections/...

T/Gen Character(s): Soya, Hakuri Tag(s): Pre-Canon, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Sick Character Summary: ...Sometimes weakness remains buried deep within though- this time in the form of a lullaby whose words are long forgotten. archiveofourown.org/works/722681...

T/Gen Character(s): Sazanami Enji Tag(s): Character Study - Angst - Post-Canon Summary: Enji reflects on the fate of the Sazanami clan months after the last-ever Rakuzaichi archiveofourown.org/collections/...

E/HakuHiro (Reversible) Azami, Char, Chihiro, Hakuri, Hinao, Shiba Aphrodisiac, Established Relationship, Fluff, Outdoor Sex, Reversible Couple, Anal Sex, Public Hand Jobs Hakuri receives the two best possible things could have wished for on his birthday... archiveofourown.org/works/72169501

Stupid idea: Magic in KB that forces two people to do a stupid, tacky porn scenario to be freed of it. Pizza delivery, room you can't leave until you fuck, etc. The twist? It only works on couples that already bone. BOOM! An antagonistic, pathetic incel enemy appears before HakuHiro! Oh no~

Changes were made after learning that I was a whole damn month off on some friend's birthdays... orz Revised Bachitober schedule (in sum, more porn has been been added)

To think someone was so inspired by something I wrote that they wanted to make such amazing art of it... I'm so moved and humbled...! Thank you! I'll keep going and do my best!

G/Gen (Char & Hakuri) Char, Chihiro, Hakuri, Hinao, Shiba Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Char PoV Hakuri's pretty weird and Char's not sure why that makes her so uneasy. It should be enough that he's nice, silly, and makes her laugh, right...? archiveofourown.org/works/72078361

Day 6 - Death Smells of Sandalwood T/SamuNori Inori, Samura Seiichi Pre-Canon, Divorce, Character Death, Character Study, POV Experimental Love dies without being nurtured; for in arid soil can nothing grow. archiveofourown.org/works/71629161

Day 5 - How the Steel was Tempered M/HakuHiro, Chihiro&Shiba Child Abuse, Self-Harm, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort Red lines on top of raised ones, born of and hidden with shame. Yet sometimes the meaning of a scar is in the eye of the beholder. archiveofourown.org/works/71967316

HakuHiro wedding on the cover of WSJ, Azami lore, Azami looking hot as FUCK as he kicks Yura's ass, all signs pointing to Chihiro and Hakuri reuniting soon, even probably seeing Hiyuki and Shiba again before the year's over. I won so goddamn hard this week.

Monitor 1: 1k+ song playlist on shuffle, talking about neck pussies and armpitussies and other niche kinks that Mormon "smut" writers could never fathom Monitor 2: writing a very serious hurt/comfort HakuHiro fic dealing with trauma from abuse and self-harm Something something the duality of man?

God, I love space and astronomy... I don't care much for sci-fi, but incorporating magic into the exploration of space? Hell yeah. I have the "So You Want to Be A Wizard" series to thank for that, I think. It gripped my imagination so hard so see magic being used to explore outer space.

G/Gen Tenri Missing Scene, Character Study Tenri stays up late on the eve of the Rakuzaichi. There’s more to think about than usual this year, thanks to his worthless brother. archiveofourown.org/collections/...

T/SamuNori Samura Missing Scene, Character Study Samura reflects a little on everything that led to him plunging Japan into darkness while he waits. archiveofourown.org/collections/...

Day 2 - Salted Fish T/ShibAzami Azami, Shiba Pre-Canon, Getting Together, EXTREME HAND-HOLDING, Extremely Unserious Teenage Angst If you asked Azami, he'd tell you he never confessed to anyone in his life... archiveofourown.org/works/71627476

Bachitober begins! Send help so I can finish all 31 fics... Day 1 - Bonsai T/Gen Original Female Character Missing Scene - Character Study A woman muses to herself as she searches for survivors in the aftermath of the assault on Senkutsuji. archiveofourown.org/works/716082...

I've seen some of the ChiHaku artists drawing more NatsUru lately... petty and stupid as hell, I know, but I'm worried that HakuHiro is being forgotten for new and shiny things. I hope they reunite soon... bring back the ultimate homotron duo, I beg of you...!

Too hot to think, too hot to sleep, what is this fucking weather at the end of September? Can we use a pear of agony on everyone who denies climate change? Especially the ones who do it for profit- they can have the pear AND a nice nap in an iron maiden.

I feel like I won this week. Another Azami as a badass chapter, he's been totally cleared of all traitor charges, and Hakuri showed up too. I just need some signs that Hakuri will get more character development and that he'll reunite with Chihiro soon and I'll be the winningest guy ever.

今週はあざさんが最強だった！彼が大好きだ。平国を全力で守れ！

Woke up angry and chose to be expressive about it for once. I'm tired of being the one who has to be responsible and unemotional despite being 31 years younger. Come at me without basic empathy and respect and see what happens, I dare you.

I feel like I can't kvetch about HakuHiro slowly fading out because it's still the most popular ship in KB. There's less stuff of it lately from all corners of the fandom because they've been apart for so long. Over a year now IRL... c'mon, have them reunite already! And in a heartfelt way please!

Converting angst into HakuHiro hurt/comfort because I can (and I really need some Chihiro comforting Hakuri right about now). Great things are being written.

I could have been the Good Kid as usual and not expected or asked for an apology to make amends with my dad. But I kinda slammed the door shut in his face. He doesn't see a problem with his attitude and didn't once apologise. I would have had to make up with someone who refused to see me as a man

Hakuri fluff and/or Chihiro comforting him would hit real good right now...

I'm not ashamed of being trans, but I wish I was cis. Just to get rid of the dysphoria of having the wrong parts and looking and sounding nothing like how I want to. I know there's a part of me that will never be whole because I can't reshape my skeletal frame and have the right sex organs.

People talking about disappearing after I overcame so many barriers to connect to them and I can't help them at all. If they were doing it to find happiness that would be fine, but it's all sadness and despair. Meanwhile I'm falling into my own anxiety pit. I hate this time of year so, so much.

Spooky season is coming. Do you know where you waifus and husbandos are?

I'm having fun with this massive project I can't possibly handle on my own please send help. I need to write almost 30 fanfics for next month.

BachiTober preview. Green finished, yellow in progress, many still to do. Genuinely will make some of these short this time. I might die otherwise.

Retrospective tomorrow. archiveofourown.org/works/71136136 Title: All the Stars in the Sky Rating: E Ship: FushiUru Tanabata, a celebration of once-in-a-year joy. A day for festivals, fireworks, and forgetting. If you could only see the person you loved most one day a year, what would you do?

Not again... does this mean I have to remove the posts where I mentioned that I'm a CSA and "regular" SA victim? That I can't talk about it any more going forward? I don't talk about it a lot, obviously, but knowing that I CAN if I want to is part of why I shifted to BSky in the first place.

CZN beta day 4. Finally got my first Owen dupe...! After maxing out Selena. Took the survey too. As always, asked for a better translation and more male units (that also mildly flirt with us like the girls do). Doesn't hurt to ask even if I'm the only one who wants it, right?

Easy CZN thoughts I don't need to write an essay for. 1. ENG script and text MASSIVELY cleaned up. Holy cow is it really rough with all the mistakes and inconsistencies right now. I don't even know what one NPC's name is supposed to be because she was called both Palutena and Parthena!

Day 3 of the CZN beta starting soon. Adulting taking priority (boo)

Day 2 of the CZN beta. More story, more systems, will be going more in-depth with the Chaos exploration mode to get cards and equipment most likely.

Gonna live post thoughts about Chaos Nightmare Zero beta here I guess. OP song I'm listening to while the 3.5 GB pre-patch (for a mobile game?!) downloads. Animation is pretty good and the song itself isn't bad. I spied a cat boy in the video and he better be playable at some point.

The official KB TWT account introduced Sazanami Sora, Hakuri's grandfather that only had a single panel... Please, Hokazono, person who runs the account, whoever. Stop getting my hopes of revisiting the Sazanami clan and all the questions I have about them... don't give me a reason to believe...

I'm kinda surprised that I'm invested in the next chapter of KB again. It's been a while. I really liked Smr and Iori's stuff, but the fights took too long. Same w/ the Kmnb fights & new chars after Urh reappeared. I like them but the plot dragged & that's why I tend to read shounen arc-by-arc.

We out here beta testing PvE gooner gacha games. Wahoo. Will be focused on PC client stability, gacha mechanics/rates, currency acquisition and unit progression as F2P, story, and if it's worth it to play for husbando chasers. Not looking great for the last one but we'll see, we'll see...

Natsuki this, Hokuto that, whatever! Hakuri was extra cute and cool this chapter and totally stole the show. Please let nothing bad happen to him, and may he reunite with Chihiro in a yaoiful way soon. Hope we also speed up these fights to keep the plot going... Kensei's looming in the background

My hands hurt so much on a consistent basis that I don't notice until the pain becomes almost debilitating. Like damn, come on, I want to finish a fic! Why are my right index finger, ring finger, and thumb so stiff and sore?! Even my neck and elbow hurt, all the way up and down the arm...

I've lost all control of my life. Sazanami Hakuri rotates in my brain 24/7 and it's fine. Psst, Shueisha. If you want my money (that I don't have to spare), make a Hakubean to match the Chihibean. I'll buy both and be content for the rest of my life.

Well. Find somewhere to gather my notes: done Finish FushiUru fic: in progress (~2k written, almost done) Do a BachiTober fic: not started Start taking T: postponed until late October (doctor scheduling) It doesn't feel great, but it's something.

To sleep: - Door closed - Box fan on high - Bed adjusted & made up - Completely empty bladder - Teeth brushed - Pillows flipped over - Cool/cold ambient temperature - Weighted blanket - Heavy pillow on head - Extra shirt (eyemask) - Extra weight on feet - Skin between toes not too dry - Sleep meds

I want to believe I'll be okay this year. Even if I lose my home because my SO lost his job, even if the traumatic memories keep coming back to torment me, I'm stronger this time. I got help. I'm on medication and in therapy. Please let it be enough...

Misusing serious planning and organisation tools for my own stupid ideas is my favourite past time. Sorry Obsidian but I'm gonna stuff you full of my world building bullshit. Goal of "finding somewhere to stash my OC ideas": complete

I wonder what will happen first... hitting 100 ideas I'm too insecure to write about, or actually writing about more than the tamest ones. Hit 60 today so I think I know how it's going to go lol.