I will be creating a new currency. It will be called "jingle" and no one else can have it, only me. I am now the richest person on the planet.

I go on a rant about the similarities between cops, the patriarchy, and white supremacy with a buddy of mine via *private* Instagram DM's and when I wake up this morning I find out I have a... 24 hour messaging ban??? Huh???? They were the only person I messaged yesterday extensively 😭

EFTA01010128.pdf Epstien confessing he had children sent to his island for sexual purposes. We knew this was the case, but to see it discussed so openly is disturbing. No alias, no obscure messaging app, just his entire name in Gmail laying it all out in one to two sentences.

If ur satisfied by popping pimples, but don't wanna get the gross stuff all over you, you can get the same satisfaction by popping the crystalized water in your shower head's rubber jet noses. Go pop them fake pimples and shower in the pimple juice that is your shower water.

Refresh rate is a myth made up by big monitor to sell more aspect ratio

When life gives you a thrifted laptop, install Windows XP and play age of empires on it

Basically if you are a pedo who r*pes kids, a murderer who kills good guys, or a bad guy who does all the bad stuff, then I say this to you: middle finger

Where the skinny bitches at? 👀 Y'all can go home ✌️

Theyre withdrawing the national guard from multiple major cities. We're winning. Keep that pressure up

The zootopia abortion comic ends in a 1:1 recreation of the JFK assassination btw

I can't be the only one who gets ads on YouTube the MOMENT the stand up to do literally anything else

The snakes head has been severed, but the snake still bites.

The lion is slowly losing hope

Conspiracy theorists were right about almost literally everything. From pizza gate to the satanic cannibalistic rituals, to the sex ring headed by elites, they were right.

Here is a picture of my emergency brake which decided it wanted to do a tf2 scrap cosplay

EPSTEIN WATCHED FNAF FUTA PORN

Y'all fw the builds or should I give up and never play Minecraft ever again

I was human once

Your car always breaks when you got $2.18 in your bank account and $0.02 in savings

I went to arbys and they impregnated me in the butt #inthebutt

I was ahead of my time

Fixed the VCR in a CRT today. Nothing like a potentially lethal 120v shock to the heart to kick off the day

All I heard from centrists when Kirk died was "stop glorifying political violence! Stop killing others for a difference of opinion!" But now that people are being killed by government agencies in the street, they're all silent. Anyways, chest rig I made cause I was bored.

God wouldn't give me a bunny because he knew if I did, there'd be world peace in less than an hour

Phase shifting through realms by taking three 10mg edibles in a row, drinking 2 java monsters, a 5 hour energy, and listening to 432 hz Gregorian chants. Imma bring the other realms together to bring an end to the senseless violence in our realm. I will be the fourth king Kamehameha.

Anyone in the socal area wanna try waterboarding torture? It probably ain't even that bad

You cant outrun me forever, Zuckerberg

In case it wasn't clear enough: -Fuck Trump -Fuck Israel -Fuck ICE -Fuck AI -Fuck billionaires -Capitalism Kills -Free Palestine, Sudan, and the congo -Leave Mexico, Canada, Norway, Denmark, and Greenland alone -Trans rights are human rights -Everyone should own a gun or know how to use one

Greek gods really just got tasked with random shit sometimes. Poseidon; god of the sea, storms, earthquakes, and horses too I guess, yeah whatever fuck it idgaf anymore man, be the horse god or something.

I put a peanut butter and jelly in the ass. I call it peanut butter and jelly ass sandwich. But you're gonna be calling it lunch

One thing I'll give trump credit for is making leftism much more popular. So many people who had considered themselves centrist, liberal, or even right-leaning centrist are telling me they always had leftists beliefs, but didn't know it was a whole political affiliation.

The whole Skyrim civil war questline is just the trump administration and Israel VS Christian nationalist neo-Nazis.

Go into whatever browser you use rn and type "nazis.us"

If you ever see my name on the voting ballot, do NOT vote for me. I WILL be persecuting people I do not like.

In light of recent events, I've decided that we will just straight up skip 2026 and move straight to 2027. Happy new year.

Hello everypony

Hey trump Eat my poo toes

I have not paid taxes ever. For people like me, a tax protest is just normal tax fraud 🚬

I am proud to announce the launch of my new project. No I will not tell you. I am nervous.

New years resolution: -Learn to hotwire vehicles -Open up a hobby store for tax evasion purposes -Grow emotionally distant from everybody -Gaslight -become a genuinely horrible person

Id play battlefield more if it didn't force EA to open every time

My girlfriend was talking about how she didn't like the present she got me because it felt like something an absent father would give their kid. I said "wireless JBL earphones?" And she was mad that I once again figured out her present in just a single unintentional hint.

I am John Antifa

College sucks. Im a computer engineer working towards my bachelors and half of my classes are about USING AI to do my work. Not condemning it, not banning it, USING it to do projects. My last class' final project's instructions literally said "use chat gpt to generate a PowerPoint"

What radicalized you? For me, it was learning that my nearly 30 year old brother gave up on his hopes and dreams to be a valet attendant working 14 hours shifts and sleeping in his car in the parking lot of a hotel that often served the most rich, entitled, and influential people in America 1/2

Fun fact about Kashmir by led zeppelin! It was the song my economics teacher liked to play in class during study time all the while he texted underaged or newly graduated girls he had in his class!

There is a hamas base in the white house @netanyahu

Treating all my followers with dozens of new posts every few weeks like I'm feeding my victims all the while subjecting them to my insufferable ramblings

How me n twins feel pulling up to any spot wearing our most fire fits