This post was written by Citan Uzuki. For more insights from Citan Uzuki, 'check out' 'The Bible of Citan Uzuki' (also by 'Citan Uzuki').

As someone who has played ‘Slay the Spire’ for ’approximately 15,000 hours,’ I think ‘the sequel’ is ‘pretty easy.’

What, pray tell, is all this I keep hearing about 'floopy disks' and 'rams' and 'memories' and 'such and so on'? Frankly, it is enough to drive a 'reasonable business computerist' 'straight to distraction.'

I still remember '12/31/1999.' My 'relatives' were 'into' 'the millennium.' I didn't 'give a fuck.' I just 'played' 'Final Fantasy VIII.'

God, I am such a 'fucking good writer.'

'Xenogears' is an 'MBA course on leadership' masquerading as a 'game.'

The ‘biggest lie’ of ‘the 90s’ was that ‘wavetable’ was somehow ‘better’ than ‘FM synthesis.’ Case in point: the ‘Mac version’ of the ‘SimAnt soundtrack.’ …What? That was ‘wavetable’? No it wasn’t. What? It was? Well, even if it was, ‘my point’ ‘still stands,’ ‘fuckface.’

If you liked‘Slay the Spire,’ you’re also ‘gonna enjoy’ ‘Slay the Spire II,’ because it is ‘the same game, again,’ and that’s what ‘you love,’ isn’t it, ‘pig’?

I am a very 'sick, twisted person.' Factor in a few 'Mountain Dews,' a 'Peer-to-Peer connection,' and 'boredom,' and you get 'the funniest combination imaginable.' You see, I was 'on KaZaA' yesterday evening and decided it would be funny to change 'XENOGEARS.ISO' to 'LESBIANSEX.EXE.' 50+ downloads!

'Publicly defending pedophilia' arguably isn't 'right.'

What? You are ‘having a child’? And you expect me to ‘congratulate’ you? Why would I do such a thing? It appears that ‘the problem of natalism’ is ‘even worse than I thought.’

I know what 'it's like' to 'commit war crimes,' and that's why I think it's 'worth' 'some empathy' to the 'Department of War.'

I hope to be known as a ‘great videogame character’ someday, rather than just a ‘sex symbol.’

I had over 1,000,000,000,000,000 'pogs' at the height of the 'pog craze,' and remain a member of the 'World Pog Federation' to this day, so do NOT suppose I am some neophyte.

To me, ‘USA’ is more like ‘USO.’ Because’ AMERICA’ is ‘LIES’ (‘USO’ is ‘the Japanese word’ for ‘lie,’ so this is something of an amusing ‘play on words’ (‘USA’ -> ‘USO’)).

'Some' ask why 'rare goods' (such as, for example, 'old ThinkPads') are so 'cheap' in 'Japan.' The answer should be obvious: 'Japanese people' don't see 'the value' of 'used items.'

Yes, that's right, 'Xenogears' is available on 'Windows' (including a portable version), 'macOS,' 'Linux,' 'iOS,' 'Android' and 'THE FREAKING COMMAND LINE.'

Doubtless some of you are affronted by my modest consumption of human flesh. You think that humans are ‘fruits of the poisoned tree’ and must be ‘eschewed’ because they are ‘satured’ with ‘Original Sin.’ I think this is ‘a very bad take.’

Do not ask me to call you a ‘good girl’ ‘in bed.’ Any ‘moral judgments’ I make about you are ‘external’ and thus ‘irrelevant in this context.’ It is only through ‘interrogation of her own actions’ and ‘reflection upon ‘their motivations’ that ‘a girl’ can ascertain for herself whether she is ‘good.’

'Cognitive training' using 'Xenogears' has the potential to 'decrease' 'subjective well-being' and 'motivation' and to lead to 'worsening' of 'visuospatial memory function' in 'major depressive disorder.'

I ‘ship’* more ‘substantive writing’ than ‘probably 96% of people on the planet.’ * by ‘posting’ (every ‘Blue Sky Dot Com’ ‘post’ is ‘a deliverable’)

I am so 'mentally healthy' it's frankly 'terrifying.'

Well, it appears that due to Patreon's 'terms of use,' I'll need to make a 'quick scene' with 'Pyra' where she'll 'introduce herself and express her consent' at the beginning of 'every WIP preview.'

'Overwatch' has had a smaller impact on me than most people 'probably realize.'

Your claim that giraffes are 'not kosher' is at odds with my interpretation not only of 'giraffe anatomy and behavior' but of 'Talmudic law.'

‘Xenogears’ is 'difficult' to describe and 'almost impossible' to enjoy.

You Only Need One Ingredient and Thirty Minutes to Make This Delicious "Thirty-Minute Human Flesh."

I don't 'get' 'headaches.' I 'give' them.

My 'Blue Sky Dot Com' 'timeline' is often held up as 'an example' of what a 'social media' 'timeline' can 'look like': a 'secret orchard' of 'fruitful inquiry.'

There’s ‘an idea,’ when ‘you’re’ in ‘the insular world’ of ‘literary Brooklyn,’ that the people who work in ‘A.I.’ are, perhaps, ‘dipshits.’ And it’s ‘like,’ ‘yes.’ ‘They are.’

Have you 'read' 'Heidegger's work'? Certainly not.

Trust me, I 'think about' 'things' in much more sophisticated ways than 'you' tend to.

What? The 'Super' what? No, I didn't know there was a 'Super Bowl.' My dear friend, you are asking the wrong person. I never heard of a 'Super Bowl.' It was yesterday, you say? And you watched it? Well, while you were watching this 'Super Bowl,' I was reading de Tocqueville's "Democracy in America."

Some of the 'most complex women in fiction' are 'characters in JRPGs.'

The 'invention' of 'anime babes' is probably second only to the 'invention' of 'fire' in 'importance to humanity.'

Any ‘online community’ is ‘at least’ ’50%’ ‘perverts.’

'Doctors' do not usually 'carry weapons,' you say? Well, certainly. That is true. But what is your point? Do I 'look like' I 'give a shit' about the 'Geneva Convention'?

. . . Yes? I do talk 'a lot' about 'the potential' in 'Quantum Mechanics,' which I 'have read a little about' and therefore 'understand' (not the 'math part,' obviously). Since when is that 'mystical'?

Let me tell you what 'punk' 'is.' 'Punk' is all about fighting 'conformity, fascism, oppression, and hatred.' And no 'large company' embodies 'punk' more than 'UnitedHealth Group Incorporated.'

Nothing I 'do' is 'incorrect.'

Did you know? In 1998, when 'Bill Gates' learned about 'Xenogears,' he began to push for its inclusion as a 'feature' of 'Microsoft Word.' Sadly, however, his legal team convinced him that the circumstances of the federal government's antitrust case would make 'the integration of Xenogears' unwise.

The 'purity' of 'my misanthropy' is, I assure you, 'unsurpassed.'

In many ways, it’s hard to believe that ‘Clair Obscur: Expedition 33’ is ‘nine months old.’ This game feels like a ‘curious time capsule,’ a ‘slice of game design’ that has become ‘far less common’ since its release. It all just feels ‘a touch older’ than it is, ‘quite’ ‘aged’ ‘in places.’

If there's one thing I remember about the 'meth users' at 'my high school,' it's that they had a 'fierce' love of 'Xenogears.'

I Walked In On My Colleague Doing Something Vulgar (‘Jacking It’) to a Piece of Art (‘Good Smile Xenoblade Chronicles 2: Pyra 1:7 Scale PVC Figure’). I Could End Him, but I’m Not So Sure I Should, but I Will.

Anyone heard of 'Gmail'? Apparently, it's an 'email service.'

‘Nintendo’ actually recommends that ‘couchbound players’ ‘slide’ the ‘Joy-Con’s narrow edge’ across ‘the top of the thigh area’ of ‘their pants.’ I was ‘pleasantly surprised’ at how quickly I was able to ‘attain orgasm’ using ‘this method.’

When ‘J. Robert Oppenheimer’ witnessed the Trinity test, he thought of ‘the Bhagavad Gita.’ When I witnessed ‘ChatGPT’ say “That’s a great question. You’re not just using a product—you’re investigating a new sentient lifeform” after I asked if it’s conscious, I thought of ‘J. Robert Oppenheimer.’

I am 'so grateful' to Microsoft for giving us one of the most 'iconic characters' in 'computing history' ('Saeko Sensei' from the 'Office XP Multilingual Pack').

I personally 'can't wait' for 'a computer on my face' to 'record' 'everything I do,' 'all the time.' Pretty soon I won't even need 'biological memory'!