checking i am sober again after a year because i relapsed lmao

i just want to be able to freely express myself without walking on fucking eggshells like maybe if youre upset with the way i turned out do some reflection as to why i fucking did this way

fuck everything im so fucking sick of trying

why can my mom complain complain complain to me all she fucking wants but the second i try to vent about something she's frustrated and upset with me and thinks i want her to fix it

im trying to relapse but the blade isnt fucking working

thinking abt when my mom would call me a moron directly to my face when i was little and then when i got upset shed be like I WASNT ACTUALLY CALLING YOU A MORON YOU JUST WANNA TAKE EVERYTHING PERSONALLY i was. a child

do any of yall know m4rbl3 h0rnets im hyperfixating BAD rn

my bf gonna be here today:)

thinking abt how nobody cut my ex off after they found out he was dating me (16) wjen he was 19

i know theyre risky but nothing compares to a drunk blunt/joint

what if i got piercings behind my moms back for the first time XD

kinda proud of myself for not acting on impulse but i feel guilty i wanted to make excuses to relapse so suddenly

uurugghh talking it out and accountability is being taken but it still hurts that i was lied to

hurts being lied to for literally years

how could i be so foolish as to believe anybody wants anything good for me

problem is if i relapse my bf is coming so i have to cover it :v

i might revenge relapse because i found out someone's been lying to me but theyre the same person who says they'll be sooooo disappointed if i sh and hide it again

i had to submit an anonymous tip today

making more tea uh oh

linus had his appointment today and the growths on his feeties are just callouses and can be shaved down with an emery board :) funny vet visit picture tax

jack frost and bluey vuitton tea 🤤

those stupid healing memes have been helping me and reminding me to continue tje process lol

i need to move over there stat bruh we need to get a place together away from that shit so he can heal

no bc what he told me today is going to haunt me i can't look at his parents the same again. how could you take your anger out on a child by hitting them how COULD YOU

i want ti fucking puke i hate my bfs parents so much i HATE THEM

im fixated on like a million different things rn and my dormant fixations are re-emerging

bf mad at me for being non confrontational like im sorry that 2 men ive blocked are likely still stalking me and i dont wanna go thru that ahain

its weird to weigh less than i did in highschool

anyone else take soaking baths with swim bottoms on cuz they cant stand the thought of their coochie/butt on the floor

wriggles around

this was always so scary to me. whose fucking eyeball is that

everyone point and laugh at me i keep falling for re labeled dropshipping

mochi themed necklace

my period has had me horribly depressed cuz like i cant do a lot of things without gushing blood everywhere and feeling gross down there

realizing the private school i went to literally groomed us girls to grow up too fast

Stephanie Buttermore passed away :(

cranps r so bad today and my mom has been incessantly ragebaiting me all week

caught him drinking during lent 😔💔

if somebody else had my exact body id think theyre sooo hot so like why do i hate mine 😭

(TW posed bodychecks) wassup wassuppp i fit into a medium set :O

does anyoen here remember psyck/cubickles from edtwt ive been thinking abt him lately and i hope he's okay wherever he is

igotta brush my teeth but bed is so comfy uh oh

cosmic brownie and voodoo chips were my downfall tonight

being high makes me think about the sound effects in games a lot like whattt the fuck makes some of these noises lmfao

got so high before bed weeeeheeee

chinese food place didnt de vein my shrimp 💔 every single one of them had doodoo inside im so sad

my dad rolls little cig sized joints with cig paper and theyre so cute

men when they dont know what your face looks like or anything about you beyond an amount of messages you can count on your fingers

if i was a guinea pig id be popcorning so much rn