"To the extent that... " is one of the classic Dumb-Guy-Trying-To-Sound-Smart locutions.

You should watch this. I've seen it (I have a small amount of drag with the showrunner) and it's excellent. Premieres Oct. 9 on @netflix.com. #BOOTS youtu.be/2mjN2f5tu2s?...

Tonight in "Are You Fucking Kidding Me With This? This Is 'Analysis'? Jesus Christ I Feel Like I'm Taking Crazy Pills":

The living proof of how much less fun Bluesky is than Threads is that right now Threads is awash in people having wholly unsubstantiated fun with rumors that Trump is dead while over here all we seem to want to talk about are things that are, I don't know, "real" or something.

You hesitate to judge, but maybe mastering a thing which has two non-moving parts (treads and side rails) is a reasonable prerequisite for being allowed to operate a 200mph death machine.

"What to know"? Honey, I'm pretty sure I already know what I need to know about this. #ServiceJournalism

Master negotiator Jerry Jones has done it again. Just a sterling piece of strategy, flawlessly executed. Note: I am an insane person.

Downloading!

"How to Report ICE" zine editions now available for free printable download: NYC Philly Durham, NC Pittsburgh, PA All of Massachusetts Northern California from Humboldt to Monterey Counties! More to come! Please share widely. drive.google.com/drive/folder...

DT phone home.

It wasn't his final role, but in my mind Terence Stamp drew a line under a great career with "The Limey." It's one of those performances that seems to sum up everything an actor has ever learned. It was quiet and devastating and absolutely a knockout.

I'm not sure somebody who writes a Substack (as I do) can afford to be sniffy about people who produce podcasts (as I do).

TIL that it's possible to fatally betray your country's principles, allies and strategic partners in a single afternoon. But, to be fair, you do have to travel to Alaska to do it.

This was a fabulous watch, and it's nice to see a couple of hugely wealthy guys who seem like decent people who want to do something with their dough that doesn't involve ending democracy. (BTW, my wife and I ate at the old CB in its last months and didn't know how close we came to literally dying.)

Just rewatched "The Good Place," a miracle of a show, and only one of the reasons why it was miraculous is that it was BOTH a continuing examination of ethics and morals, and also the home for the most fart jokes in all of sitcom history. I'm not kidding. I admire it so very much.

One thing I know is, when a strongman leader orders federal troops into the streets of the capital, it’s a look that screams “NOTHING TO SEE HERE. JUST A NORMAL FUNCTIONING DEMOCRACY. MOVE IT ALONG (or these recently mobilized and heavily armed federal troops will apply a taser to your genitals).”

"deeply personal pizza" is that anything

I really dislike it when people try to mine a sociocultural generalization out of "people who shower in the morning vs. people who shower at night." For example, I happen to shower in the morning, but it's only because my sheets are made of thinly-sliced onions.

When I was a kid I wanted to be a baritone sax player but then I realized I don't look good in a short-brim fedora so

A possible #tsunami may hit coastal areas of Los Angeles County at 1:05 AM. But keep in mind it's LA, so it'll probably be like 15 minutes late.

The state of CA was thoughtful enough to post some #tsunami hazard-zone maps. Unfortunately the site's so slammed that it's inaccessible. Because there was apparently no way to anticipate that if anybody ever needed the maps, a *lot* of people would need the maps. Anyway, it's been nice knowing you.

My absolute least favorite framing for anything is THE GREATEST {NOUN} YOU'VE NEVER HEARD OF. I mean, please do fuck off with that. So let me say it this way: If you're not familiar with Tadej Pogačar's body of work, you're missing out on something astounding. #TDF2025

Just in: Jasper Stoyven awarded purple jersey, signifying rider whose name sounds most like something Jerry Lewis would say when startled. #TDF2025

Q: Will you tell us what your tactics will be today? A: No, I will not tell you that, and... yeah. No. Q: I see. And will you tell us what your tactics will be today? (Every interview with a rider in #TDF2025)

This Damian Lillard story fills me with hope for humanity. Especially because he went back for the change in the sofa cushions -- $22.5 million/year, figuring he's only gonna be on the floor for two years out of the three. I mean, the Blazers could have got me for $15 million. Ten, even. #NBAsky

My wife: "Did you eat the rest of that linguine in the fridge?" Me: "Yes, but it was purely a financial decision."

Among other things we learned today, we learned that when Donald Trump tries to write dialogue it comes out like bad fanfic.

Yes. He's got 10 months to think about how to replatform himself, and the possibilities are endless. He's not the casualty here. The last vestigial shred of CBS's reputation is. 1/2

The only part of this I disagree with is that the outside of the window is 24 hours. He'll be crowing about it in 3, 2, 1...

Odds that the Oval Office has a new tenant before the Ed Sullivan Theater? Not zero. But you guys know me, I'm just a sunny optimist.

"Phew." (The Wall St. Journal)

"AT LAST, SOMETHING WE VOTED FOR," SAY THESE SIX TRUMP VOTERS IN A DINER ABOUT PRESIDENT'S PLEDGE TO RESTORE CANE SUGAR TO COKE

man me too

If in 2014 "The Simpsons" had written a gag about President Trump extemporizing about trophy wives at a White House faith luncheon you would have thought: "Naah, too easy, this show's coasting now."

Great little thought experiment from The New Republic's @timothynoah.bsky.social: Can ass-kissing become so extravagantly florid that even the recipient begins to detect its falsehood? Like Tim, I'm saying it's most likely a "No" in the case of of Donald J. Trump. newrepublic.com/article/1978...

Uh oh. hammertownusa.substack.com/p/i-am-part-... #humor

I know it's fashionable to dunk on The Gray Lady, but this is an unbelievably terrible framing. And it isn't one of those cases where the hed is divorced from the thrust of the story. Nope; they match.

MAMDANI'S TROUSERS MICROSCOPICALLY TOO LONG, BUNCH SLIGHTLY AT ANKLES; INVESTIGATION DEMANDED

Hot take: Everything about Department Q season 1 was great -- the acting, the writing, the direction -- except the case. The case was murky and impossible to follow. Twisty is one thing, purposefully opaque is another. I will not be taking questions at this time.

This guy's very good.

"Woods Hole, as you know, means hole in the woods. Or some woods near a hole. Look it's not a great name okay"

Every time Kristi Noem begins a sentence with "Frankly" an angel gets throatpunched to death.

Facebook, which does so few things well, did this: it served up this absolute heartwrecker as a "Memory" today. If you've never seen it, prepare to be destroyed by a master at work. #storytelling

My position is that Bruce Springsteen's "High Sierra" is the best short story published this year. I will not be taking questions at this time.

I've been trying to figure out if Hakeem Jeffries is an empty suit or if he just doesn't have the horses to do much of anything except make speeches. And then I realized both of those can be true.

People like to draw parallels between Deandre Ayton and Dwight Howard. Why not? I have confidence that the Lakers' Ayton experiment is going to be every bit as successful as their Howard experiment. #NBAsky

We've now officially reached the stage of the postseason where I'm learning how much guys I never heard of are going to make next season. NBA fever -- *catch it!*

"F1" is completely predictable, ludicrously formulaic and utterly ridiculous, and I loved every minute of it.

BRB, I just gotta put on "Faithless" and "Inyo" and go on a road trip through Utah and Arizona.

I can't believe I've gone from thinking "Tracks II" is the perfect argument for streaming to wondering whether I should buy it on CD or vinyl. This just in: I hate myself! #VinylSky