It’s that time of year again! For the next 8 months I’ll be posting pictures of all the new blooms that pop up in my yard. Don’t fight it, it’s going to happen no matter what. I did set it to calming music to make it more enjoyable, so something like that.

Skin is weird. So I lost a bunch of weight and noticed some extra skin and sagging, weird but not unusual. Once the weight loss stopped and I started putting on muscle the skin started shrinking again! It’s so weird how bodies just do stuff like that. Anyway my bellybutton changed shape 😂🧐🥴

Anyone else have really weird dreams last night? I had a one dream that goofy was a person and he had sex with his mom who looked like his son’s girlfriend, and his stepdad walked in so then he was homeless. That was like the beginning of a very bizarre journey of events. Super vivid and detailed.😖

Which celebrity chef would you most like to fix you a meal? Gordon Ramsay, because he could make even my cooking look good!

Anyone planning to check this out?

I’m wrecked from my core workout so I’m going to spend the day making tea. I make custom herbal tea blends for friends and family, mostly for lungs/mucus/COPD (big hit for cold/flu season), sleep, arthritis and diabetes. If you could drink a delicious cup of tea rather than take a pill would you?

Good morning! I have a lot of new followers that I suspect did not do their due diligence; so if you’re new to me now might be a good time to make sure you’re in the right place 😂

I made myself a pizza for breakfast but it got a little overdone. On one hand that’s a bummer but then I remember I’m an adult with free will eating pizza for breakfast so how bad could it be?

I hiked about 1k feet up, only about 1.5 miles to the top so steep at points but nothing crazy but I was there rock hounding and going down with a 49lbs backpack and rocks digging in your back makes things considerably more challenging. Also the amount of snake and big cat warnings was concerning

Two months of boxing lessons. It’s weird because I don’t feel different but then I see this and I’m flabbergasted. I haven’t gotten bigger just more dense 😝 Actually I lost 6” off my waist. Smaller but stronger. Wild.

Went outside to see what the crows were freaking out about and spotted this in the neighbors tree. The local crows have some sort of deal with the squirrels and I often see them watching over them while they forage, this time they were flipping out trying to get the squirrels into the trees.

How do you synchronize watches? Like what does that mean?

Serious question… what weird events did you have in school? I remember yo-yo people, the reptile guy, ex-cons ripping phone books in the name of sobriety, jump rope troops and people who made us square dance. Do they still make kids do weird stuff like this? 😂

The amount of snow in California right now is wild. Down to 1500 ft in some areas! Spent half the day yesterday wrapping up my tropical trees 🌴 and moving small potted plants inside.

UPDATE: Tyra’s mom just passed. Thank you to everyone who helped out. It’s not much but it gave her some peace of mind to be able to spend the last minutes with her mom and not have to worry about what happens next. bsky.app/profile/kyli...

Currently my situation is, throws a left hook wrong

Tyra is a sweet girl who has been a big help to my family and I just found out she’s in need of some help. Her mother is in hospice and she’s trying to raise money for the funeral. She’s a young lady who is working really hard and has no other family to help her 😞 gofund.me/2c5a752ed

It’s February 17th 2026 and it’s a real weird day because it’s: Chinese New Year Fat Tuesday Comet C/2024E1 hits apex Mardi Gras ring of fire solar eclipse beginning of Ramadan conjunction of Saturn and Neptune And there is a lake and super bloom in Death Valley

Valentine’s Day treat! A first edition, first printing. *swoon*

Boy I thought the gym, the equipment and hiring a trainer was expensive… no one told me I’d have to buy a whole new wardrobe! My favorite corduroy skater pants went on and immediately fell off 😥

I watched some girls playing “never have I ever” at a bar and about 3 turns in I realized this is not a game I can ever play. 😂 Can you imagine the obituary? She died because she did it all. 😂

This is a very important question. What’s your favorite (top 5?) newer science fiction movie(s)?

This is a very important question. What’s your favorite (top 5?) older science fiction movie(s)?

Made myself a little something for this weekend. 💙💚💙💚 Go Hawks! 💙💚💙💚

I can’t sleep so I wanted to tell you about Megatherium. It was a GIANT ground sloth that lived 35 million to 11,000 years ago. It was the size of an elephant and stood 10-12 feet on its hind legs.

Okay it’s taken about a week but I got 4 new raised beds in and planted. Should be able to be completely self sufficient (fruit and veggies) by the end of this year. 🤞🏼 This garden makes my tits look great 😝

@kylie-jordan.bsky.social 🤭

Making Cajun style collard greens tonight because I’m trying to clear out my raised beds for spring. I should have enough for 6 months 😂 better clean out the freezer before it’s done.

I’m trying to eat more fish so tonight I’m smoking some small trout fillets. I made a lemon herb brown butter sauce to go with it. Just gonna heat up some leftover rice and steam some broccoli from the garden as sides. I’m going to use the smoked dill to make a spicy dill dip for superbowl.

I love going to yard/garage/rummage sales. It was a thing I used to do with my dad as a kid, he called it Urban Treasure Hunting 😆 I’ve noticed that people don’t really have cool stuff anymore, few antique/vintage items and almost never see books or original art. It’s all plastic and cheap clothes.

Can someone explain to me why there’s like 75% less time in a day? I miss being a kid and feeling like time was endless. I swear I was up at 4:30am and I’ve done like 3 things.

First iris of the year. This little guy must be confused.

Life is like a wiener. Sometimes it’s hard for no reason.

I never used audible before the end of 2024, looks like I jumped in head first 😝 I was actually kinda surprised by the stats #AudibleStats

Why did Mozart kill all his chickens? When he asked them to name the world’s best composer, they all said, “Bach bach bach!”

Painted my shoes to match my gloves cuz I’m cute ☺️

It was really hard to get my phone to focus but there were perfect spheres of dew on my broccoli that were glittering in the light and it was so beautiful. Little tiny rainbow sparkles 🌈 💖 🥦

Well this is a thing 😆

So today I got punched in the face 😂 first day of “sparring” for boxing and well, I got punched in the face. Also somehow got hit in the glove and that made me punch myself in the face. Hahaha Honestly this is really fun but I’m motivated to practice more now 😆

I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia. She whispered, 'They're behind you...'

I need an AI program that writes catchy jingles using my emergency contact numbers because I don’t know anyone’s number by heart anymore but I know who to call if I need cash now. 🤦‍♀️

Well I did it. I bought a laser. Did my first test last night and I think it’s safe to assume I didn’t read the instructions on calibrating the settings 😆 It’s only a failure if you read the instructions first, right?

For our Dad Jokester @kylie-jordan.bsky.social …

Heard an old man say: “Why did the sperm cross the road?” “Cuz I put the wrong socks on this morning.”

Tried making char siu in the smoker and it came out delicious. I didn’t have fermented bean curd so it wasn’t the typical bright red color. I decided to skip the final glaze (just lazy) but the flavor was still amazing. Also I think I used the wrong cut of pork but again, delicious.

I like audiobooks while I workout or when I’m doing artsy stuff but I have been having trouble deciding what to listen to so I just started listening to the free stuff until I can be more decisive. Today I found a random audiobook with a crazy cast. I don’t know if it’s any good yet but wow