How tf would I know the address of the elephant in the room with us?

Would you rather reach out and touch God or the Fubo button on your remote?

Pressing the Fubo button on my remote just to feel something

Eagle Scout? Ok badge merchant

At bat with my zipper down. Call that a sack fly

K but what if your type of “vert” is “per”

these renderings of the planned white house ball room are ridiculously tacky

Becoming an early investor in “wankclown”

No context images I’ve sent to friends

A falconry hood for the modern man

Me when I’m in hugging class and everyone’s partnered up to hug but we don’t have an even number of students so the teacher says I can just practice hugging with the chair

A panicky run from me trying to survive while capturing placeholder footage for Look Up And Go. Anyway here’s the eve of a trailer I’m working on. #screenshotsaturday #gamedev

Sorry I don’t have the calf strength required to walk softly while carrying this big ass stick

You’re wearing that? Now? In the time of monsters?

Sainz to the #F1 stewards

Yeah, I’d like to try the taco soup salad, please

The key to writing code when you're bad at coding is doing incantations before running it #GameDev

[Guy wearing one of these voice, talking to his secretary]: Joanne, forward that shit to my ass, I’m going to take this poop from the toilet

Waddup big dawg, take your shoes off before you come in haha but no please do, the shapeless ones get super mad if you track dirt in

Got that certain je ne swag quoi

A heavy mech cock, you say? And this is the third one? My oh my. #GameDev

Do Androids Dream of Electric Feet

Cool Winnie The Pooh:

We call that “dog medicine” in the dog medicine community

Our AI powered toaster knows when it’s in a bathtub

@patrickklepek.bsky.social Dunno how best to submit this new game I found on Steam to you, but it's extremely "your shit" store.steampowered.com/app/3672320/...

Guy at karaoke who forgot about that part of Money For Nothing

Ankle deep in empty bottles of Bawls. Communal vitamin D deficiency. Smell so thick you could taste it. We used to be a proper country.

(touching her c-section scar) would you stop, for me?

This person is not listening to an audiobook, I’m sorry

Self inflicted viking funeral

Proving I’m not a bot by running traffic lights

Not planting a tree because it’s only the second best time to plant one and that’s not a winner’s mindset

James Dyson is an air type so he’d be weak against Steve Jobs because Steve Jobs is an electric type. Luckily for James, Steve was weak against getting treated for pancreatic cancer. #pokemon

Standing outside of a European Wax Center like a pro-life church group begging the women to reconsider.

Instead of walking simulators, they should be called sadventure games

Trying to make a joke without getting put on a list

This one's for #GameDev: I sent a rough WIP trailer to my friend and said my 3 biggest inspirations for the "styyyyyle" were @sorath.dev's Hyper Demon, then Nix Umbra, and Swarm Lake. I got this extremely affirming reply. If there were a box, this would be on the front cover.

Driving a Prius filled with ice cubes into the ocean is the only way I can reenact the submarine sequence from Mission Impossible

Enjoy your "digestif" The real men will be having a digestough

@kirbysmartuga.bsky.social she's probably still got 4 years of NCAA eligibility since she never played over here.

Direct translation of a phrase in Mandarin used to describe unemployed friends:

Ageless non-binary person with a portrait of Dorian They/Them

Every AI company is doing the Dril candles meme but every single item is candles

45 seconds in and #MechaBREAK is good youtube.com/shorts/yg_2_...

When I drink yellow Gatorade I’m an adult who is getting back important electrolytes after a workout. When I drink blue Gatorade I’m an iPad kid.