May be I just like making people happy, more comfortable, more able to abide this place, because i know how much I dont like the state of things. I know I want old games to end. I know I want comfort, love, and healing. I struggle to always be that, my anxiety prevents me from being more productive

I think about how before the orbits of planets were established, astronomers had complex models made of nonsense to explain those movements. In the end they produced "true" outcomes. Like how it got there was incorrect, but the answers were right. I'm wondering which one of us ends up being which

Me: "I need total independence you freak fucker. Nobody instructs me on those matters and I'll declare a war that'll persist long after your names are forgotten." Also me: "😍 😍 you want me to wear a collar and show a bunch of freaks what a good puppy i am?! 😍 😍"

My partner is talking about taking me to a play party once the puppy thing is further along Collar, leash, muzzle, no talking And I'm so fucking wet

"It's also infuriating that a usurper's actions are genuinely dictating how something much bigger than them is seen. He drove them to near extinction, did a bunch of heinous shit to the earth, and turned around and used the remainder as a scapegoat for his own actions, and were still dealing w that"

Ffs i need a class on how to parse that thing people do where what you're saying can mean multiple things I hear it and with certain people i assume it's in play so I'm listening intently for it But i need help parsing it reliably

Life is so beautiful and existence is really neat And i don't want to, I don't think i can, believe it's as bleak as it seems I don't mind being insane or whatever, but it would be hard to believe everyone really is more or less reduced to heartless monstrosity. I can't accept that.

"Man... a bunch of it is real isn't it? It's so depressing to confront Until i hear it I'll be uncertain, but like... The tests yield answers that are hard to explain otherwise."

I really am love and light. I'll protect it, right? Like the fangs bared are in recognition that not everyone is You can strip away my identity and ego and protective self concepts But underneath all that is the source of it for me. You can't reveal a void within whose mass can swallow it.

I think a healthier situation would beget the question of, "why was this intervened upon?" And not "how can i ignore this or get around it?" Like justice isn't just some vague idea, it's a way to approach and deconstruct the action of self and other that prioritizes fairness.

Justice can maybe be frustrating. Everybody wants it when it looks like what is in their head. Especially if it has been labored under But you never cared about the concept if it's only that fair weather friend. Some day my lady will bring my injustices back to me. I know I'll hate it.

Lol trying to game it all back because you being in the wrong and witness to cycle after cycle of abused justice coming home to roost. It must be cheating rather than calling in debts and asking for accounting for what was done. You should stop barking up that tree like that. I doubt her amusement

I'm realizing how much i need strong women to bully me.

I've seen them without soul. I've seen them malicious and given over to their worst selves. I wasn't ready for her. Her living self threatened to burst through her corpsely affect. She wore demure submission like the rotting skin of a victim worn coat. her Kayser swagger hiding queenly footsteps

She snuggled me and told me to believe what i needed, that she didn't care an iota But she said my obstinacy would just break my heart. Then she tapped my nose and said i would cum harder than I've ever cum once i realized I've been damned the whole time, and then she vanished.

Hey spirit? Hope you're well it seems terrible down here Was wondering if i could get the dead one's memories but not their ego the persona is a dead end I also wanna be able to just speak in tongies again so like, is there anything you'd trade for that

How many inferior copies you gonna spawn anyway You won't get songs for the deaf twice

Call it an aspirational self portrait

Just painting on sketch paper Guess this one might be called,"Well, since we're dreaming anyway..."

I hate wrestling but because everything is about as real as wrestling i will now be relating everything through wrestling and disney metaphors Pastor with a backwards cao sitting in a chair backwards energy but it's to tell you that we're at a "fire solves problems" stage in the game of life

"Yeah i stopped liking the WWE once i realized the stories were fabricated, the fights were staged, but the support of the Zionist entity to say nothing of the millions of unhoused, undocumented, and uninsured, endure a very real and nightly siege upon their minds, bodies, and psyche, ."

I guess I'm still fucked up by it because I never agreed to die for you. My exit conditions are unfair, and I don't believe they're forgotten. The door you walk freely through becomes my guillotine if I can't have it So the way you see a traitor, i see a murderer. And I wanted to release both

I'm in my own world most of the time. Every door that lets me associate to our common one makes me happier. I hate the loneliness. The separateness. More than anything I've been deprived of belonging. I wouldn't meet you, or they wouldn't meet me. Or both. Why did i do this to myself?

There is no machination that will deliver you a grander outcome than a mundane February sunrise. In its weakest state it blushes and sets the sky on fire, never even regarding your exercise in futile expressions of power

Sun's going down Moon's rising high We'll be your falling star terror Late night you party until it's light While pointing at the sky Wash your hands in the lake of your blood Just before you die

"I think it's just time to publish though. Like things should be known I have a shape I'd like the world to take, but who fucking cares. I know how they manage these moments. Matroshka mommy says chill, pushing distress away by reaffirming your mission, minimizing the thought contagion emotionally

"This idea that he was malevolent is stupid. It's part of the game that was being played. so much of your history is literally a game and continues to be. I think one of the chief disagreements was whether sincerity was necessary for system stability + flourishing, and to me the answer is obvious

"In the demiurge's world, there were two systems created to help us figure stuff out. One was automated - a kind of library available to anybody with the knowledge to access it. Access was gated by the knowledge of it alone - deemed sufficient alongside soul tags kinda like little clearance markers.

I can be falling apart and broken in a million ways but this is and always will be my basic disposition. I love you all. This hurts immensely and I'm furious. I will dispense love and wrath in their measure, no matter what.

Hey Pluto, I just wanna talk. I just wanna have a chat. I wanna ask why everything I'm struggling with goes back to your decisions and commitments. Why is my will negated by yours? Present your face i wanna punch it.

"...He knew he had been tricked, in this way and so many others. In this, his own obedience to the rules were suspended so far as he saw fit. They would later say he couldn't be trusted now, even though the base nature was so deeply programmed at this point that in comparison that became hilarious.

Nobody else has a needle that pierces both of those materials, and no matter what you think, the sins of the father convey no such venom

It's really the immediate distrust of narrative justification. You're telling me and acting on narratives again. I feel rising despondency that maybe you really are this foolish, that you may think winning this romance novel with a game of fortnite bolted on gets you anything.

Oops I Fell In Love With You As A Human But I Want To Set Your Character On Fire For Perpetuating The Story - my new novel

Lilith successfully puts me in a puppy place in my head. It's transient. It does not persist in big ways (to be fair i chase birds and im substantially more comfy in my horniness) but when she looks in my eyes and tells puppy to let go, i am rarely happier than that moment.

The moment is so energetically expressed, the state of entropy in reality is so high that it's just the appearance of the thing is the earnest truth of the whole moment. You can separate yourself however you want, but at some level you, too, are the senile Lion shitting himself. You are also

Yeah this kinda. Otherbeing desires. I definitely know I wanna give < than a single iota of a fuck, nary a single calorie of heat to human stories and pretensions, mine included. Feed the apes, make them happy, give them knowledge while taking away their stories, leave forever - katie goals

"I can't pretend to be a mastermind - I was basically awash in an ocean of stuff I didn't understand, with very loud, fixed pylons of terror in understanding, perception, dream visions, and the areas of our body that govern the fight-or-flight response. That THIS thing's presence made me 'smarter';

"Four layers, from the immediacy of the body to the most distant iota of self. The count is arbitrary, we can define each shell of the matroshka along near infinite fine-grain axes But Four will do. Mine have never all been awake at once with the full weight of who they are present.

"that one's dead, i'm just the child"

the Guy Who Made Guitars Like Came Up With The Entire Idea says they should be fretless.

still thinking about how danaerys was mostly cut down because she would validate the victory of like, a morally driven cause inclusive of revenge and justifying violence built on proletarian rage. like it made no sense, but she had to become monstrous at the touchdown line or else the liberal world

Guitar music is coming back. Sorry it's gonna be a big deal again. It's already manifested. There's nothing u can do Instead od narcissistic rocker boys tho it'll be metaphysically obsessed queers singing about insane shit. And it'll be for today and tomorrow And 😈 there's nothing u can do 😈

last night i was in a suit of armor i think, and i was like, an insane child? i was with a group of people, and I think I didn't want to be there, and at some point i realized i could do that kind of stuff. sometimes in dreams i can just do stuff, it can be like pulling and massaging Something

This light source sure is bright and toasty

mossadGPT mecharapist leftoid therapyspeak goes hard

Hector never got what he wanted except from everyone who already agreed with him, and he never could figure out why.

Andrew wk's i get wet is so great 🎶 I get wet...

@boobgoldberg.northsky.social not saying this is about you but...