I just want to draw, but brain is saying no.... 🥲😭

I was working on my portfolio, because I stress about jobs anyway. But now going back through all the work I did, I just get sad and frustrated. I feel like all of this was for nothing. Because in the end I have no idea how the fuck I am suppoed to be able to work with my conditions..

Uvo

Watching @howsmyhandwriting.bsky.social figure out Clip Studio Paint is so funny. "WAIT YOU CAN DO THAT??", I don't know how many times I heard that withing 10 minutes. I love that spouse 😭🩷

you know what's crazy for me? Some days ago I had the realization that even things like the kitchen and bathroom are fully mine now, so I just roated my kitchen dining desk by 90 degree. For some reason I still felt like this part of the apartment does not belong to me.

I started decluttering and it was surprisingly fun and easy. I hope I can start fully clean my apartment for real now. I struggled with saying "Oh I wanna clean" for months without being able to fully commit. I started with my clothes today and I even finished all of them.

I saw the notification on X in my phone bar, then I just opened Bluesky and waited patiently 😂🙏💕 (rt) (the green color... Mm... I love green...)

#マエル誕生祭2026 #エスタロッサ誕生祭2026

I KNOW WHY I AM FEELING SHIT. IT'S THAT TIME OF THE MONTH AGAIN, AH-HA! ☝️🤓 I need new painkiller....

I want Mael to sit down on my face so I loose can finally pass out and sleep. (Saruman, probably(definitely not me))(I can't fall sleep... Someone pls bonk me, I don't wanna suffer anymore 😭)

I don't know how much I can work on the manga atm. Or generally how much I'll be socializing. Stuff is a bit hard at the moment (and I am not talking about my nonexistent dick lol)

キバダン そろそろ先に進みたいキ(※微ero)

GALAR FIRE DEPT.

I made myself a refsheet for Mael's outfits... If any of my mutuals who have the racer skin would give me screenshots......I would kiss you wet on the mouth 👉👈

🥰🥰🥰

I miss Mama Hawk.... She was queen..

The improvements they're doing to Origin sound good. Even though I am sad that we have to wait longer now... I was really looking forward to the release this month.. 🥲

For the size I want to share my favorite meme I saw on tumblr

//Full Process// www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ea6t...

☀️Mael~🥰 I really love his armor from the game! I even have it planned as cosplay... but no idea if I even manage to make it 🫠 #7ds #mael #Estarossa

I think you can tell what Saruman got influenced by..... (And I have a type in men......)

I don't know what to post at the moment, so have this old drawing I made of Mauga in 2023 (It's been so long...). I normally wouldn't post anything out of my main fandoms, but I have been craving this psychopath lately again.... 🥰🩷 Though, I am still impressed by my art skills back then...

Remember when I said that Homura by LiSA was a perfect fit to how the story of ❄️☀️ ends? I now found the lyrics of Akuma no Ko (AOT) and this is the same thing. So if you ever wonder what Saru x Mael is about, just look at the lyrics of these two songs....

Is it just me, or is Bad Apple resurfacing as a trend/meme at the moment? Maybe I could draw ☀️ or 🐉👑 with something related to it.... But I already thought of drawing 🐉👑 with the current JJK fight meme..... And I got no motivation too..... 🥲

Can we please keep the 169 followers? I don't want it to go up or down. (I have the humor of a boy in puberty.)

🎁💖Happy Birthday to my fav boy!!💖🎁

I hope you guys know I am damn well staring at Mael's armpit (🍅 drawing)....... Thank you for the excellent food 🍅🙏

今日は可愛いマエロサちゃんがいっぱい見れてよかった………

//Speedpaint// youtu.be/rDONA4HCHg8?...

Happy Birthday, everyone 🙏💕 I wish everyone in this Mael family, a pleasant and great day. (someone pls tug me back to bed, I only had 5 hours of sleep and I have to clean today.... (cat made a mess tonight))

先给你们看！🥹少女漫！小狗，请选择你的男友！💖 #マエル誕生祭2026 #エスタロッサ誕生祭2026

🎉Happy Birthday Mael!!!☀️✨️❤️❤️❤️ #マエル誕生祭2026 ☀️❤️💋

#マエル誕生祭2026 ☀️ //Happy Birthday.

Maybe I should start animating my artworks or make cute idle animation artworks like in video games. It's kind of sad that my Live2D skills are just useless now. They shouldn't go to waste...

生日快乐🥳 #マエル誕生祭2026 #エスタロッサ誕生祭2026

I think I'll try to stay up until it's midnight here so I can post the Mael drawing

Don't give up..

....... ❄️ und ☀️ spielen 'Hoppe Hoppe Reiter' und ☀️ ist nur am kichern ... Der Gedanke verlässt mich nicht.... Gott, is das hart cute 😭 Ich weiß nicht ob's ne englische Version davon gibt, also wird es schwer das zu übersetzten falls ich es zeichne...

I just won't post Mael's birthday drawing on X 👍 I thought about it, but no. I might sit down soon to delete all the art on X too. Right now I just don't have energy for anything. /cries

ギエキダ

耳毛が好💛

공중날개택시 탈때 다들 안전벨트 안하더라.. 안전벨트 해..

I love how from the outside it looks like we all know what we're doing. We're skilled artists with a lot of knowledge. But I'm honest, I have no idea what I am doing. I don't think any of us really know what they're doing. If line is not wobbly, then we'll yeah, it's good enough lol

I'm on my knees. On the floor. This is so pretty........ 💕 The hair flow??????? I want to explain how much I love this but I fear, I don't have words for it. (RT)

下描き全然進まなすぎる、これちゃんとペン入れできる気がしない、普通に描き直したい、でも時間ないよ～、、、、、😭😭

#Mael ☀️

I had lunch/dinner for the first time this week. I am proud of the progress

Baby turned into a hamster because he’s nervous… 🥺🥺

Mael being Escanor's personal trainer is so unbelievably funny to me (new Netmarble comic)