New depths of tat in my dad's junk mail pile. Can I just check how much it is?

Yeah they do. We all do. We see you BBC with your duplicitous headlines. 👀

Been on the phone to First Direct this afternoon dealing with some complicated stuff. In this age of all large companies being crap and uncaring, I'm happy to say they've been superb! Not all banks are the same. Like politicians.

Stuck in a password authentication feedback loop with my Dad. He is deaf and won't let let me type. Or help. Or suggest anything. I am short of temper with both him and tech that is too complicated for normal people to understand. Its Russia's fault isn't it?

Market day in local town. The French let the public scramble up and down this mound without so much as a warning sign. 'Elth-and-safety-gone-mad was never anything to do with the EU.

I'm Jewish. I'm also Mancunian. Every other national party leader was interviewed by Laura Kunesberg during their conference. Maybe the BBC thought as someone who also supports Palestine - I had nothing to say? Let's keep growing: join.greenparty.org.uk

Some problems are best solved with early nights, regular exercise, healthy veggie food etc. And others are better dealt with via afternoon beers on the island. 🍺🍻. Cheers.

Swallowtail caterpillar slumming it on some hogweed. In the UK, they insist on milk parsley - which is why they're so rare over there!

Galls to it all.

Jonathan Pie - spot on as ever. But he's not real. With the exception of Zack Polanski, why don't real politicians say these things with this passion? www.facebook.com/share/v/1Eko...

Incensed by the news? Snog a horse. PS - climate change is real and paracetamol doesn't cause autism.

A timely reminder of our policy on fans of DT and the causes of DT. No Trump Supporters Here Please - Le Moulin De Pensol share.google/QIvTS8TWa4Qz...

RIP Chickeny Girl. Destroyer of rare invertebrates and dodger of pine martins. Died a uniquely peaceful death for a French chicken - in her sleep in her house. No one to get in the way of the Tour de France now. 🐔🫡❤️

Well at least the solar panels are happy. 🥵

"Our" river Bandiat. 💚

I'm not sure we should let the Chinese state buy Thames Water. Didn't the Defence Spending Review just call China "a sophisticated and persistent challenge"? Let's maybe not sell our key infrastructure to our enemies. Love and hugs to all UK Chinese citizens obviously. You are not your government.

These three completely different beetles are all the same species. I love that.

New depths of shallowness- the shopping magazine Country Living encourages us to go self sufficient....IN PRESSED FLOWERS. 🌺 @georgemonbiot.bsky.social

I made a cartoon to explain our review problem. French guests say lovely words about the place "beautiful location, great breakfast, friendly hosts, haven of peace etc" then give us a 8/10 overall score. Which feels like a kick in the teeth. Worth a try maybe.

I've just joined the Green Party. This nasty Labour Party can f**k right off. Photo of the marbled newt I found in my pantry yesterday - just because.

I mean it's nice reading and responding to your stuff, but I miss the bit from Twitter where you respond back to me! Feel like I'm howling into the void here. What's the trick with Bluesky? 🤔

First talking head is my son 😍. youtube.com/shorts/Y8WtI...

This makes me feel slightly queasy. How does anyone ever learn English?

Big beautiful violet oil beetle. Happy Monday everyone.

*Taps sign with greater urgency*

This cheeky western whip snake was chasing a western green lizard yesterday, in a limousin version of wacky races.

The 3 horses and 1 mule of the coming apocalypse.

The burnt tip orchids are up! The best of all the orchids (don't message me).

Tackling climate breakdown will: 1. Kill your houseplants 2. Make you bald 3. Stop your cakes from rising 4. Give you cancer And of course 5. Reward the Chinese Top journalism as ever by the billionaire owned Telegraph.

It took 20 years for the electorate to trust Labour with the economy after the winter of discontent. I wonder how long it will take before we ever trust them with the environment again. Personally, I don't think I ever will ever forgive this betrayal.

New blog on why we don't want Trump supporters or climate change deniers here anymore. Going out to my 20 or so followers 🙌😄. Can't seem to be able to post link but it's on our website under blog!

Coypu! I wish they were beavers. Maybe we could get them some prosthetic tails?

This is crazy. Turtle dove numbers were just starting to creep back up in Britain, thanks to the shooting ban. Can legal action be taken against the European Commission? www.theguardian.com/environment/...

Paint me like one of your French lizards.

My husband had a stroke a year ago today. Thanks to the French health service they found and fixed the cause (hole in the heart) and now he's as right as rain and as annoying as ever. 🙏🙏❤️. So grateful. #notanaprilfool

Why aren’t you wearing a suit? Have you said “Thank you” to Greenland and Denmark for allowing you to have a base on Greenland?

While others try to make sense of the world, I am drinking plum vodka in the garden. Happy birthday @niksmith.bsky.social

'Spoons in Headingly for some of life's pleasures that I can't get in France. I mean bars run by objectionable right wing divots are two a penny - but nice beer and UPF crisps i struggle to find.

Roses are red Violets are blue

The French government is sending us all a survival manual. I'm sure this is fine. 🤔

So we're after disabled people now are we @teamlabouruk.bsky.social ? I don't remember you mentioning that in the manifesto. Nor the ridiculous "nature versus growth" briefings. WTF are you doing?

"The Leaky Dam" A mixed media work in clay and sallow. Artist - Nik Smith

Went for a full-moonlit run round the lake with the subversive informal (not) parkrun group this evening. We don't have the paperwork to be a proper group so we sometimes bump into each other and go for a run. Saturdays at 9 is weirdly popular. Slow time due to stopping to look at the stars!

Whatever could the billionaire owned Daily Telegraph have against net zero? 🤔 👀

What a massive load of bollocks.

Unaware of global politcs, a baby horse snoozes sweetly in some mud.

Today I am going to a seniors shop to buy a new ferrule for dad's walking stick. Now, my dad used to race motorbikes and jump out of planes so this is not the most exciting day of his life for him either. But we are both looking forward to it. And we get to say "ferrule" alot which is nice. 🧓

The state of American Christians who spent their whole lives following a fairytale, then when Satan turns up and starts choosing his henchmen ACTUALLY HAND HIM THE REINS OF POWER.

So VoldaTrump seems desperate to meet King Charles. Isn't this a great opportunity for Charles to snub him in a way that Starmer can't? T would be totally humiliated, Charles would be a global hero, it would save the UK monarchy and it might be an emperors new clothes moment. 🧵