Natalie Would
@nataliewould.bsky.social
📤 600
📥 266
📝 394
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Art is the world's G spot
almost 2 years ago
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Hot male nurse said I have "great veins", so I'm thinking a June ceremony
almost 2 years ago
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*reaches acceptance* *goes back to denial*
almost 2 years ago
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At 1000 followers I'm showing pinky
almost 2 years ago
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To whoever has my voodoo doll, please stop making her go to work
almost 2 years ago
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I have 2 dance moves: stripper and I wanna go home
almost 2 years ago
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He showed up and that's a deal breaker
almost 2 years ago
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My family crest is a coupon
almost 2 years ago
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Focaccia would be a great name for an hysterical matriarch
almost 2 years ago
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Sorry I disappeared for 10 years, it was a reflex
almost 2 years ago
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Damn boy, are you my self esteem? because lower
almost 2 years ago
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reposted by
Natalie Would
She was rare, like a goth with dimples
almost 2 years ago
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Dust is yesterday particles, sweat is now juice, dreams are the director's cut
almost 2 years ago
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It's lonely at the top? now I really wanna go
almost 2 years ago
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I'm getting a lot of Oscar buzz since my upstairs neighbor Oscar went off his meds
almost 2 years ago
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Men will literally swim naked in a Bass Pro shop aquarium instead of going to therapy
almost 2 years ago
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BREAKING: Sex dolls unionize, demand more closet space
almost 2 years ago
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He calls you doll face because you have dead eyes and you're his transitional object
almost 2 years ago
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*somehow gives a sarcastic hug*
almost 2 years ago
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It's ok house, I'm settling too
almost 2 years ago
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The enemy of my enemy isn't doing a very good job
almost 2 years ago
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Every room is an escape room when someone starts reading their work
almost 2 years ago
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You can shoot the messenger, as a little treat
almost 2 years ago
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All pets are rocks
almost 2 years ago
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Raisin hate is ageism
almost 2 years ago
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We're all just our parents' emotional support DNA
almost 2 years ago
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So, is there a Mrs. Elephant Man?
almost 2 years ago
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Oh, you like yourself? how quaint
almost 2 years ago
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Excuse me Sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?
almost 2 years ago
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Everyone should be presumed gay until they come out as bi
almost 2 years ago
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I'm between personalities
almost 2 years ago
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Has anyone ever had a polite awakening?
almost 2 years ago
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What's So Good About It? - A morning show
almost 2 years ago
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*takes delusional as a compliment*
almost 2 years ago
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One day I'm going to make some very lucky man a wonderful case study
almost 2 years ago
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Single and dready to mingle
almost 2 years ago
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Birthday candles should be shaped like little headstones
almost 2 years ago
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mind me
almost 2 years ago
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In Texas you can rob a bank with a copy of Beloved
almost 2 years ago
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Throw pillows is an instruction
almost 2 years ago
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Gee, I sure hope my intrusive thoughts get a lot of likes this year
almost 2 years ago
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I'm still writing Good Luck on all my checks
almost 2 years ago
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Another year? have we learned nothing?!
almost 2 years ago
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reposted by
Natalie Would
Excuse me waiter, there's a tiny Jeff Goldblum in my soup
almost 2 years ago
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I've seen you take communion so why can't you take a hint?
almost 2 years ago
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Money doesn't buy happiness but it can pay for the expedition
almost 2 years ago
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Throw pillows is an instruction
almost 2 years ago
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Me: Also me: The voices in my head: Fo shizzle... Chin up, old chap... Location, location, location
almost 2 years ago
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All the boys who've been brought to the yard by my milk have found it unshakeable
almost 2 years ago
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Money doesn't buy happiness but it can pay for the expedition
almost 2 years ago
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