Your tiny house panther will lose its mind. ✨ Spend $50 and get this feral backyard nip FREE. ✨

In this political and economic dumpster fire, help foul-mouthed,women-owned biz survive. Doris Bizarro makes goth, glam,and sparkle beds for weird pets. From tough babes like Coney Kat to best-seller Just the Tip (yes, it’s a tiny dick), support small biz and buy something ridiculous.

An octopus took acid. Its brain melted. Its head turned into a cupcake. Now it’s covered in eyeballs and cosmic regret. This toy is unhinged and built like a tank: 🖤 Super-reinforced seams 🖤 Extra-tough construction 🖤 Made to withstand most super chewers (because nothing survives everyone)

David Lynch–inspired. Agent Dale Cooper drank so much coffee the great horned owl crossed over and became a dog toy. So tough, so reinforced, even BOB couldn’t penetrate its mind. Built with serious bite resistance, reinforced seams, and just enough otherworldly energy Available now. Damn fine.

She whorls. She squeaks. She will make you look deep into her hippo soul. Stare too long and suddenly it’s 3 a.m., your dog is possessed, and you don’t remember starting the game of fetch. Soft, strange, hypnotic. Not a toy. An experience. Proceed with reverence.

A three-eyed alligator walks into a bar… well—struts. Bartender asks, “What’re you having?” She says, “Whatever you’re staring at.” She’s pink. She’s fabulous. She’s got three eyes and still clocked you first.

A three-eyed alligator walks into a bar… well—struts. Bartender asks, “What’re you having?” She says, “Whatever you’re staring at.” She’s pink. She’s fabulous. She’s got three eyes and still clocked you first.

She whorls. She squeaks. She will make you look deep into her hippo soul. Stare too long and suddenly it’s 3 a.m., your dog is possessed, and you don’t remember starting the game of fetch. Soft, strange, hypnotic. Not a toy. An experience. Proceed with reverence.

David Lynch–inspired. Agent Dale Cooper drank so much coffee the great horned owl crossed over and became a dog toy. So tough, so reinforced, even BOB couldn’t penetrate its mind. Built with serious bite resistance, reinforced seams, and just enough otherworldly energy Available now. Damn fine.

An octopus took acid. Its brain melted. Its head turned into a cupcake. Now it’s covered in eyeballs and cosmic regret. This toy is unhinged and built like a tank: 🖤 Super-reinforced seams 🖤 Extra-tough construction 🖤 Made to withstand most super chewers (because nothing survives everyone)

In this political and economic dumpster fire, help foul-mouthed,women-owned biz survive. Doris Bizarro makes goth, glam,and sparkle beds for weird pets. From tough babes like Coney Kat to best-seller Just the Tip (yes, it’s a tiny dick), support small biz and buy something ridiculous.

#tinydick #trump #tinydickenergy #women #smallbusiness #cats #dogs

#jeffgoldblum #thefly #dogs #cats

#cats #dogs

#dogs #cats

#supportsmallbusiness #smallbiz #indieauthor #horrorauthor

New Product Drop! Available tomorrow at 10am! Made for cats and small dogs ! #pettoys #petsupplies #cats #dogs

Someone needs to take that sharpie and shove it up his ass #dumptrump

Happy Birthday Esther! You’re 4 now, so it’s time to stop shitting in the office.. #rescuepoodle #birthdaygirl #turd

Went to North Cascade National Park today 2/28. This beautiful place, will these fuckers take it away from us? What will happen This summer with the forest fires? Everywhere was damage from last summers, when we had all the NPS working to save it. #nationalparks

Happy 17th birthday Ava, my crazy old lady! #dogs #happybirthday

The humans having more fun throwing a dog birthday party than the dogs! #idiots #dogparty #dogs #spoiled #cake

Happy birthday! Craig did not eat the beef-flavored dog cake… #dogs #birthday

Birthday party! #dogs

Birthday party!! #dogs

Fizzy did not love the birthday hats! Happy Birthday Ava! #dogs

Happy 17th birthday Ava!!!!!#dog

You guys, I think I've lost control, I don't know if I'm making birthday hats, or all my dogs are about to get jobs as Showgitls. #dogs

Ava‘s birthday is on Sunday and she’s gonna be 17 and she’s old and crazy. I’m making a cake for her and all the other dogs and I just went to get a birthday hat and I can’t find them anywhere so I just spent $40 on craft supplies to make 10 party hats for my fucking dogs. #dogs

Eyesaur! Crinkle and catnip pet toy, made extra durable for homes with both cats and dogs! Get one today @dorisbizarro.com #shopsmall

buy a Pinkeye get a free Kram-Puss! Enter pinkeye at checkout! #pettoys dorisbizarro.com