It feels kind of messed up to say this, but I watched my Mother accept her death. She was on Hospice in her own home for 3 months. We were all very well aware of every step closer she got to dying. It felt like I let go of her weeks before she died. I am most definitely not ready for my Father.

Cute Halloween Boba Tea Time

One time in my high school gym class my gym teacher got the bright idea to have our class do a 'trust fall' exercise. My school was extremely classist. I opted to help clean up some gym equipment while I watched. The class let the girl fall I watched her head bounce off the ground.

Just read someone describe Magnesium Citrate as 'the human safe version of Drano' Accurate.

"You didn’t see that sitting there? What are you, fuckin' blind and fat?" - not my Dad probably.

Why is Mt. DEW soda neon

Today is a bad pain day. 11 days until my infusion. Time to start poppin' otc pain meds like jelly beans.

There is no greater moment of happiness than watching a dog run freely.

I'm my own greatest disappointment. Congrats me.

Man I shouldn't try to do nice things when im tired. I totally fuck things up. On my way home from work, which I left for at 5:30 this morning, I picked up subs I ordered for dinner. And my husband ate most of mine.

Why is the secret to yummy chinese food sauce 8 ingredients or more?

I made him promise when the time comes to let me go.

It's funny that my generation isn't having kids... Y'all know we made dead baby jokes as kids right?

I think I finally broke. The groceries came in today, as usual, and I got fresh lunch meat. Of course my dad wanted to make a sandwich. So he busied himself with some sandwich construction, plops it on a plate, and heads to watch wheel of fortune. (Dad, a proud basic bitch)

I miss static on the TV

I hope the last time I close my eyes I do so feeling safe and loved. Today has been a day. I'm still tired.

A terrible part about someone you love dying is afterwards, after all the crying and yelling and funeral and tissues and everything... They aren't there anymore. And they never will be.

One of the worst/best things about having three dogs is the vomit. I despise vomit. Everything about it makes me want to vomit. The other day, one of my dogs vomited and walked away, and I pretended it wasn't there, and then the other dog ate the vomit and it really wasn't there.

Yesterday I stood outside on the porch in the early evening watching the dark clouds above swirling, the electifying flash of lightning and rumble thunder surrounded me. Taking slow deep breaths, I could smell the rain. If I had to be frozen In one moment for all time, I think I would be ok here.

When I die I want my body to be cut up into 18 different pieces, and make sure they never find my head.

"You were only supposed to be napping," How you end that sentence changes so much.

If a person walked up to me and introduced themselves as 'Zest' I would die laughing.

That poor woman.

One of my favorite moments in time is when an entire stadium of people sings a musician's lyrics back to them. And not their top hit. No. I mean the hidden track that begins 18 minutes after the last song on the album ends. The one they poured their heart and soul into. That song.

Just learned the phrase "disco rice" Go ahead, Google it. I dare you.

Every gray hair is a kiss you've been given in the past. God I'm moody af today

Oops Feeling dead inside again

Why can’t we just turn off our feelings?

Some day you'll hug someone important to you and it will be the last time, and you won't know it until later. I'm tired. I'm tired of being strong. I want to rest. I need a break. I'm sorry.

I really don’t think they understand the effect getting rid of smex writing would have on a very large group of women. Some days good smut is the only reason I haven't gone out and cut off a bunch of below the belly button body parts.

My new favorite thing on the internet is videos of squirrels unexpectedly jumping on people.

I miss my mom. She had this way of making my problems seem so much smaller. Made me feel like I could do anything.

People who've never been "medically dead" can not appreciate the all encompassing serenity it entails. I want that back so desperately some days, but I would never force Death's hand.

I have had A Day (TM)

Does anyone else have draino day in their home? A little backstory I have 4 dogs & my hair is like a foot & a 1/2 long. So we have drano day which is the 13th of every month. We pour some drano down the drain to avoid it backing up as this usually concurs with when we start having slower drainage

My heart feels best when I'm petting a dog.

Sitting here watching a Christmas lights special on TV and trying, really trying to feel festive but, I really don’t know if I have any left. I'm just so tired And I keep thinking I just want peace And how I don’t want to leave a mess behind, but I don’t want to be all alone either. I'm sorry

There will come a point in every life where the person no longer wants gifts. They don't have much time remaining. There just isn't a point anymore It can even make them sad, because they know they'll never get the chance to enjoy your gift. So, Spend time with them instead. And talk.

I don't photograph well I can’t hide my pain, It shows on my face.

Living is hard.

Damn. bmjgroup.com/homicide-is-....

Getting so tired of being here.

All the talk about employees needing to "come back to the office" for "valuable face time" & to "make sure their employees are working" I give you this: www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2024/... Wump wump wump ):

It's hard to not let yourself want something, but if you don't than you can't feel bad for never getting it.

www.tiktok.com/t/ZPREL6NYX/ Love his voice, and messages

I laughed www.tiktok.com/t/ZPRws4E6X/ And if you think it's mean to laugh at Kennedy I've got one word for you: Rosemary

Sometimes my brain gives me Really Fucked Up Thoughts (TM) like How my Father's beautiful sky blue eye is clouding over due to cataract and how my mom will never see it because she's been dead for over a decade. Like, ok brain WTF?

I don't want to die. I just don't want to hurt anymore. The older I get the more my body and mind are in pain. And I'm just so tired.