I have nowhere else to post this bc she has all my other socials but here’s a new sentence for y’all

Me: it’s 20 minutes till close, can you start refilling change at- Coworker: vroooom Me: … can you start refilling- Coworker: nyoooom Me: Coworker: Me: and once you’ve done that can y- Coworker: vrooooooooom Me: you can’t just make racecar noises at m- Coworker: VROOOOOM

Charging my vape with my laptop cord feels like putting jet fuel in a lawn mower

It should be illegal to do yard work before noon on a Sunday

Crazy what can ruin your immersion in a fic. It’s a pea coat not a petticoat. A petticoat is an undergarment worn under skirts to give volume. A pea coat is a jacket. Unless supervisory special agent Aaron Hotchner is wearing a skirt ur wrong. Tried to keep reading but had to stop and find another

Posting on ao3 and putting a lot of tags so more ppl can find it and then more ppl find it and now I’m expected to write another chapter

Telling my mom (a veteran) that I know my third amendment rights and shutting the door in before she can come in every time we get home is so funny I giggle every time

Accidentally spent $180 on vapes bc I forgot geek bar is done how’s ur day going

Dude I blocked made a new profile to msg me again last night and I fell asleep while he was sending me pics and a million other notifs and when I woke up they were all gone. And I don’t know if he’s still on there but I’m nervous

Things my coworkers have said today: 1. “Are u ticklish? That’s probably inappropriate to ask, actually. But are u?” 2. “I’m in my slut era” to which I said don’t do that and he said “but it’s cuz ur my role model, tucker” 3. “Oh ur training someone! Are u hungover?” 4: “bend over and spread ‘em”

My aversion to shipping as a necessity aside, Superman frequently leaves batmans hole ruined btw

Anyways jinu as Lotor and Keith as rumi goes crazy. WITHOUT the romantic subplot they had going on tho I just need gwi-ma (Zarkon) ruining jinu (Lotor) and jinu (Lotor) continuing the cycle with rumi (Keith)

I like consuming content without needing to consider ships <3 don’t get me wrong I love a little ship here and there but can I tell you how hard I was flamed for a Keith and Lotor concept which I had written as angst and everyone assumed I was shipping them? Like dude fuck that I want them miserable

I’m normal I’m just a Klance anti <3

ME I DONT WANT TO SEE KPANCE IN 2025 AND I DIDNT WANT TO SEE IT IN 2018 AND I WONT WANT YO SEE IT IN 2026 FUCK KLANCE

Anyways Lotor being a temptation to a struggling Keith who is newly navigating his Galra identity. Lotor who is also tempted by shameful things (quintessence) urging Keith to join him. Be what he was born to be.

I want to voltronpost but I fear it is no longer 2018

I am normal

Went to Disney in 2011. I was so excited to go to Pixie Hollow bc I was obsessed with Tinker Bell. We met Silvermist (my fave) and my parents got distracted with smth leaving me with her for a minute. I asked if she can keep a secret. She said yes. She leaned down. I whispered “I think I’m a boy”

They would understand each other so well…..

YKNOW WHAT THIS SHIT LOOKS LIKE #kpopdemonhunters #sodapop #sajaboys

I’m in this chipotle and I can hear the BOH speaker. They’ve played all star by smash mouth, krusty krab pizza, and now numb by linkin park. I cannot wait to hear what’s next in the queue.

Sent a risky text chat do I kms

DONT GO BREAKING MY HEARTTT I WONT GO BREAKING YOUR HEARTTT

Need to be him

Hommina hommina hommina

I have not eaten yet but I’ve had a beer, two shots, and poppers. This will surely not have consequences.

Happy 9:34am, gotham

Good morning Gotham, I’m getting ready for chicago pride with the essentials

That’s my pookie

Had a dream I was a Kpop idol and omegaverse was real in this dream and it was very odd. This is why I need to stop getting drunk and watching Perfume by NCT Dojaejung several times

My favorite lyric in anything ever is the really autotuned “l’chaim” in I Gotta Feeling by The Black Eyed Peas

Me: roll for initiative Sibling: I rolled a 2 Me: smacks them upside the head Sibling: what the fuck

yall stay safe out there. protect yourself, protect others if you can, disable face id on your iphone, cover up markings and tattoos, do not sit down, wear a mask, no contact lenses, don't throw tear gas back and remember to hydrate. YOU are your FIRST priority before anything else.

Peaceful protests are great but riots are what got us queer rights. Riots got us workers rights. Make yourself heard. Pigs will take any opportunity to incite violence and blame the protesters. Defend yourself and know your rights. Speak out for those who don’t have the privilege to.

If you see dumbasses posting to sit down if violence breaks out DO NOT LISTEN!!! That is putting yourself at greater risk. Move cautiously out of the way of danger, help those around you, and record everything happening. DO NOT SIT DOWN!!!

My whiteboard just says this and I don’t remember why

Me: freaking out a little bit Ukrainian coworker: what’s up? Me: just got a chance to look at the news, saw the missile strikes in Iran and I’m real nervous cuz I have family there Ukrainian coworker: relatable

Bad morning to my son who I hate

I am a true red blooded American 🦅🦅🦅‼️‼️‼️🇵🇷🇵🇷🇵🇷🇵🇷🇵🇷🇵🇷🇵🇷 I love my president the American way: with my tongue so far up his ass I can taste his lips 💪💪🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

FOR GOTHAM 🦇

Bad morning to my son who I hate

What does one do if their friend/coworker asks if they can practice pegging men with you at the exact moment you have to clock in and you’re just stuck thinking about that proposal all shift cuz not that I wouldn’t be into it but damn girl I just woke up

The spread for 2day

Meat reveal

New additions to the list: - Bruce Wayne whump - superbat hurt/no comfort - superbat fluff - NCT mark Spider-Man au - geraskier sillies

Happy pride month thanks for dealing with my mommy issues oomfs

Don’t even need $88 million I’ll do it for free

Rare pics of me defending Gotham (producing a fashion show and accepting an award)

Is this how Gotham citizens feel when I’m on their rooftops?