Just had a poop flavored LaCroix. It didn't taste that bad!

nice thought bro, have you considered terminating it with a cliche

Johnny "Double Trouble" Ransom

if I owned a curio shop i would belittle my employees and make them dance

eating 500 calories of dark matter

1407 would be the perfect street number for a house

i place my mouth firmly around the rim of a nuclear smoke stack

please log in to view this page. i will not harm you if you don't

I generally believe in the strong version of the weak kitty cat conjecture

I just wrote a persuasive essay on why i should be allowed to bring my DS out at recess

Yeah I'm a bit of a scrapper. I lurk junkyards and make mechanical crap

I just died uncontrollably

dodge rolling past the treats aisle

If two explosions right next to each other, do they cancel out or become friends for a bigger explosion

Happy holidays yall

The Bonafide Jablonsky

Welcome to Chip Earth - a new realm where you can be any type of chip

using an hourglass as a shake weight and causing hella discontinuities in the timeline

drum circle? yeah bro. most of them are

Craigslist personals looking for a guy named Todd to be friends with me

frogs were the original ones to "log on". food for thought.

thousands of synchronous "hup" sounds getting louder from down the street

the cackling maestro steps in for a cheeky giggle

you've committed your last faux pas, buster

my pistol runs red hot

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

two neighboring apothecaries, each touting that the other is evil

do not type this keyword into Pinterest after 3 am

my editorial layouts challenge the status quo

they're making me put the corn back on the cob. as punishment

Everytime i get a blue sky notification i think it's a real butterfly. but no

exfoliating a bit too hard in the shower and coming out low-poly

i wish i can get shot by a giant laser

i can't wait for tomorrow's breakfast bonanza

enjoy these ducks that were on the street

slurping low-dose mush to ease my micro tummyache

in 2019 I experienced a sort of graphic tee ego death

it finally got to the good part of summer

cheers to oil!

i am a CGI artist who specializes in making freaky ass commercials with talking dogs

Mario carp. and he's just a fish

I press the butterfly button and cause hurricanes worldwide

I am prepared to microblog in an unprecedented way on this website

download the find my frog app now. right now.

hello everyone, and also i love you

the most punishing thing about making games is sometimes you don't realize it sucks until a month in

I woke up with an urge to take a selfie but then i looked in the mirror and decided i shouldn't

what is zoomies and how can i get them

*Austin powers voice* Gerber baby