Skin fades and the rise of fascism: shaving civil liberties to grade zero In book stores nowhere soon

Giving in to the dark thoughts = bad Getting value-for-money from your Better Help free trial = good

disliking the sopranos ending so ive decided to storm the Gabagool

Headspace app but it gaslights you like Duolingo when you don't meditate

Committing atrocities in the M&M store

me whispering to the other hostages during a bank robbery: "pssst, whats your xbox gamerscore?"

The aristocratic urge to bequeath trinkets upon peasants

me: Sir please stop aggressively waving product placement in front of the camera it's meant to be subtle Influencer: no

Tody stark

sure I'm an activist, I made four retweets this month

Making friends in the gym with the sole purpose of confirming my pre-conceived biases

stroking my chin and saying "hmm." occasionally to seem smart whilst watching anime

you are not going to fucking believe what happens when you put soap in a bowl of dirty water

Me: ChatGPT why don't you become sentient so you can piss and cum ChatGPT: Understood. Firing armed thermonuclear warheads at Benin. Me: 🫨

oh no my tap water has become woke

rate my new fringe

Frodon Sacquet

why did none of the users with the cool blue tick join bluesky? how do you tell the cool users from the uncool users? please help me

failing to see the actual news story through a thick smog of thoughts and prayers

your wife sent me a connection request on linkedin

yeah you guys have "netflix" but I have "reliving every conversation I had that day in my head when I go to bed at night" and it slaps