Stu Holden is insufferable.

There are SO many of these rolling around Austin now I can’t believe nobody has yet to start plastering, say, “K^LL ELON” stickers on them yet.

Welcome to doing business in Texas, I guess…

Because TVs are in every goddamn restaurant now, got the chance LAST NIGHT to involuntarily gaze upon 3 John Cornyn ads in a row where he’s still bragging about voting w DJT “99% of the time.” What an absolute bitch.

So where the fuck did anonymous go? Bunch of limpdicks at this point.

Anyone surprised by Mark Cuban strikes me as the same person who is apoplectic when they found out that Paula Deen had been dropping N bombs for years… He’s probably most famous for Shark Tank- the show that’s the burning man of end-stage capitalism. Anyone associated with that show sucks.

@aprecourt.bsky.social #AustinFC- would it be too much to ask to go talk to Kim Hellberg?

BREAKING: Austin FC has parted ways with sporting director Rodo Borrell and head coach Nico Estevez.

In re #AustinFC: Moose put in a game winner for Grenoble last week, and Columbus fired their coach today after 14 games… @aprecourt.bsky.social did you hear all those boos last night?

Renaming the dog “couch colored missile.”

If you see this quote with a pic of you in glasses.

Let’s skip that altogether and move to deciding whose car is gonna drag his burning carcass through the streets of DC.

Feels like soon- maybe any day now- one of these shitheads (labor sec or some shit) is gonna get tied out there like that goat in Predator.

History tells us there should be more assassinations about now.

Hyde Park getting its groove back in the most Hyde Park way possible:

Why is this always true? <standing RIGHT IN FRONT of gate 796> can’t hear: mushmouth flight announcements on volume 1 for our flight to Dallas. can hear: “welcome to today’s non-stop service to Burbank, we’ll begin boarding here at gate 4 momentarily” on volume 11.

Always weird when you see a post and it’s like “wait- that’s my dog!”

Reminder.

In case you forgot.

Got the email yesterday that #AustinFC supporters section season tickets are available at 615ish bucks each. That works out to about 35 bucks a game. I have NEVER once paid 35 bucks for a SS section ticket. Precourt can pound sand, yet again.

Daily reminder.

Apropos of something.

Tucker Carlson wore a bowtie when he was 22, in case you forgot. Fuck that guy for 30+ years now.

Oldie time.

Anyone else find it weird that the two most high profile shootings, easily, in American politics in 45 years are just… dustbinned?

Why Bukari isn’t the primary focus of this attack is completely beyond me. Easily the most dynamic player on the squad. And has been since the minute he set foot last year. #AustinFC

Again, #AustinFC is not a well coached team.

My best buddy, just a few minutes before he shuffled off this mortal coil yesterday, after 17 years. The river flows…

I know what you’re thinking: “I’ve already met the dumbest motherfucker I’ll ever meet in my lifetime.” Well… lemme show you something: www.facebook.com/share/r/1PPo...

It’s our daily winner of a free FUCK YOUR FEELINGS salute! www.facebook.com/share/r/15zW...

All these distractions are working! Guess what nobody’s talking about lately- Benghazi.

#AustinFC is not a well coached team.

That could (nor should) have been a 3 or 4 goal game. #usmnt sucks.

No big revelation here, but #USMNT (and MLS and American soccer in general) has a root problem. None of these guys, despite any and all credentials, make incisive decisions, runs, or passes. It’s like a wet hot dog bun of a game.

Heather Graham once spun around blindly in a crowded Tex Mex joint and dumped her entire margarita on my shirt. She said “oops,” turned around, and disappeared into the people.

Nico, it ain’t working. #AustinFC

ZERO short/intermediate verticality w #austinfc.

Fun night in Austin at my favorite old haunt of a parking garage.

Eureka.

“Neurospicy” = mayonnaise

What’s the first thing YOU’D do after buying a 30 year old beater pickup?

Why is the word “cohort” in every goddamn sentence written lately?

Land of the Rising Sun. Austin, TX.

Decades of hearing this song and there remains no creepier incel, jerkin’ off in the closet with a pistol waiting for her arrival song ever written:

Day 18,524 of nobody calling me a “rockstar” on LinkedIn. The flicker is fading, y’all.

Imagine if Ghengis Khan’s raison d’etre was “troll.”

WTF happened to Anonymous? They’ve gone…