I see all gambling as equally a waste of time getting got at a rigged table: Vegas, crypto, kalshi and its horrible children, all of it. If you engage with any of these, congrats, you’re the sucker at the table.

“stop calling it slop” is the “just bing it” of 2026

“I love ____ and I won’t apologize for saying so” 100% translates to “I love ____ for the really awful things ____ does, which is the only situation where apologizing about it would make any sense”

If you are still posting on a site that hosts a CSAM generator, you are a lost cause. I will bravely find a path forward in my life without your companionship. I'm a survivor.

I'm watching commentary on RaptureTok and I can't help but see crossovers to this brand of wishcasting. And like the Rapture, it doesn't matter how many times a date comes and goes without The Event happening, a new date will emerge. Similar to MOASS apes, too. An exploited bug in the human brain.

You're 12 at a family dinner party, it's 8:30pm, and you just walked into the room full of people in their 40s

Admitting X is your safe-space for an audience trained to clap like trained seals at any dumb idea a billionaire farts onto the platform is certainly a choice. “The Nazi site is nice to me!” We know.

You can tell something really super-racist went down when the GOP boomers start kicking up dust about Lincoln. “We were the good guys 150 years ago!”

A frenzy of renaming landmarks after yourself seems kind of panicky. It has "the pyramid must be finished *in time*" energy.

One of my first interactions on twitter was calling Jim Cantore an idiot

I think it's entirely fair to immediately retract any paper that cites one of these slop citations in any capacity. They obviously didn't read the sources they cited, so they aren't real papers either.

Worth mentioning that Charlie Sykes, the editor-in-chief of The Bulwark, is a long time racist who enjoyed playing a parody song on his WI radio show titled "It's Free - Swipe Yo EBT" decrying his neighbors having access to food. I wouldn't take The Bulwark seriously on this, or anything else.

It's hard to understand why this horse paste gobbling moron is a US senator (my US senator, no less!), when all he does is copy/paste old-man-brainrot from whatever facebook ring he's been captured by, and occasionally indulge in some light treason as a treat.

Going to geriatric-millennial a bit: It's also not fun. The consoles are too expensive and play intermediate upgrade games on an already too fast versioning schedule. Games are hugely expensive and don't make fun gameplay a priority. Microtransactions everywhere. Why bother?

WH destroys a Thing for a Reason. The chorus of "destroying the Thing doesn't actually help you with the Reason" and "the Thing has a lot of value, actually" are appeals to sensibility presuming the Reason has anything to do with destroying the Thing. It doesn't. With this WH it never has.

"KEVIN! YOU SPENT $967 ON ROOM SERVICE?"

I’m not The Dipshit Whisperer. Neither are you. We carry no responsibility to that place or to the people who choose to remain there.

Sometimes I'll read a bluesky thread and there will be a response masked as 'Rude' and I'll open it and it says something like "I also enjoyed the sequel"

Probably my favorite LinkedIn AI hype diagram to-date, featuring an absolutely feral human coder farting on Thanksgiving while a server hosting a thirsty AI looks away in disgust. At the heart of this nonsense, who do these guys think the tech-based economy is supposed to be working for?

I still have a shot at the Forbes 50 Under 50 list, there’s still time to shine

me on Friday at 4:49pm after finding a bug in my code

I’m such a no-sports loser I don’t even know which sport it is you all are complaining about

University admin needs to learn that no matter how much you analyze and moneyball your choices on programs to cut, the only thing students hear is “don’t come here, your major department could get cut before you graduate”. It’s an opaque shell game.

Working in academia, you are constantly confronted with The Mission. No we can't pay you market rate or even give you a COL adjustment this year, think of The Mission! Yes you have to work unrecorded hours after work, it's for The Mission! Don't you care about The Mission? Then they do this.

Tis the season for hot takes about holiday foods that telegraph that the poster comes from a family of zero cooks and they just assume everyone’s [insert food here] is terrible

Just tried Marmite on toast for the first time, and I can confirm that it is a thing that exists

is part of being Alpha that you maintain at all times the stoic expression of someone who was just dunked on by a street magician?

IMO this also applies to pollsters asking "who do you believe won the 2020 Presidential election" and "does Ivermectin cure cancer yes/no?" alongside legitimately boring questions about municipal governance and taxes

"What perfect album came out when you were 16?" "Add your birth year to this database we're scraping together."

me doing a pull request to "fix up a few things and make it run more better"

Elon to develop space data centers, presumably after finishing autonomous robots, full self drive, starship, satellite internet, the hyperloop, a Mars colony, and functioning PayPal 2 factor authentication.

People are in a state of perpetual bewilderment that NYT is a shameless rage bait publication, I guess because there was a time in the distant past when they were a legit source of news? Let’s all agree they pivoted and treat them with the same dignity awarded to NewsMax or The Babylon Bee.

The mental illness I’m cleverly hiding as a sense of humor

What I like about Madison is that it has both the vibe of a small college town AND the smell of a fertilizer plant

“Time to turn up the pressure even further” I say, as my party retreats from the one scrap of leverage they had in order to save the opposition from facing consequences.

am I faceblind or does Grok draw a picture of Grimes when Elon asks it for loveslop?

Me while the code I wrote is ruining everyone’s day

What a wonderful way to make your employees miserable and your store intolerable to shop in at the same time

The hard call to argue your own daughter doesn’t deserve marriage rights, in the tough time of having to balance being both a terrible father and a powerful force of evil in government “genuine conservative” I agree with, as a pejorative

“Curbing emissions is not the priority to tackling climate change,” says guy whose foundation has an $11B financial stake in a key player in the AI bubble / investment loop. Surely we must listen to his wisdom on this.

Me convincing myself that one more supplement should be all it takes to undo a lifetime of bad health decisions

I only just found out that the battle over climate change is scored on whether Bill Gates, a certified non-expert in climate who has a tremendous financial stake in energy hogging AI nonsense, agrees with your side or not. Remarkable country.

Elon having absolutely donkey-brained takes on Tolkien is not surprising since he boasted Grok would be sassy in the style of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, an electronic encyclopedic reference book that was in no way sassy.

I mourn the loss of civil service as a worthwhile scientific enterprise

I wake up, I check the news. I see the donkey in charge of the EPA is opening an investigation into weather control and contrails. I see the president got big-mad over a commercial and cut off trade negotiations with Canada. I pour a coffee and remind myself to google expatriation at some point.