The coolest. She needs to make sure to include Pochita in all gold photo shoots

Crystal Skull. When the monkeys taught Shia LeBouf to swing on vines, I was out

This is something I say a lot, but the fact that one dummy can go into the guts of an AI system and turn up the Be More Wrong dial really belies so many of the premises behind what we’re being sold

This is deeply unpleasant to watch. I do not care to see these bodies.

Curling is such a great event to watch. I love any sport where you can watch someone pause the action to take the lay of the land and then come in and absolutely ruin someone’s day. Oh you think you’ve got a perfectly laid plan, well I’m gonna throw this rock really hard what do you think about that

I need the most manifestly unhealthy people in the country to stop telling And Look How I Turned Out anecdotes

All sorts of reasons why one might not esteem nazis

Aggressively calling the whole family into the living room so I can utter the words “Coot Veal” aloud

Calling them dueling halftime shows is so great. Yeah man one person is holding an epee and the other one has a bazooka pretty much evenly matched here

They just showed Drake Maye in a panthers jersey at Super Bowl 50 and now his performance makes more sense because he’s clearly paying tribute to Cam Newton

Every time a figure in pop culture says something mild and anodyne like “it’s better to love than hate” the president goes, they’re clearly talking about me.

It’s extremely funny for Ring to come up with a tech that has the most obvious use cases for evil and all they could come up with is uhhh it can find your dog

Personally nothing makes me enjoy the process of reading more than the knowledge that the book was written extremely quickly. Give me those run-on sentences that go nowhere. Make me say aloud on my couch “that probably needs a comma there”.

This has the exact same vibe as Christopher Guest performing for veterans at the end of Best in Show

Even under all that gear I can still tell that shirt is screaming for its life

Imagine how people would treat a player in, say, coed slow pitch softball who tried to claim it was unfair the other team scored runs after their team led in the 3rd inning

I don’t think body cams will be very effective considering that the guy who shot Good was already acting as a cinematographer for the murder he committed

Elon would never be caught engaging with a system of sexual abuse, anyway Grok please put this conversation in a bikini

Uhh so is the audience in the Royal Rumble mostly empty? Looks like a house show in there

It’s a little crazy making how the biggest group of conspiracy nuts were convinced that there would be a righteous cleansing of all the pedophiles in the government and that group was on the *side* of the politicians who were actually deep into it

Yeah I think being able to make bad movies just a little less bad when they’re on screen is something that shows who the really special actors are. It takes commitment but also generosity of performance to pull that off.

Catherine O’Hara is one of the funniest people ever of course, but the scene in For Your Consideration where she begs through her unmoving plastic surgery face for a nomination is as good a piece of dramatic acting as any of us ever get

I don’t know if it’s the fault of the training staff or act of god, but the Nuggets sure have had a lot “woops never mind about that” injury returns this year

I’m so glad I finally have the opportunity to play Breath of the Wild, the game that had never existed before this

Hmmm Bruce Springsteen just realized a new song about me that he wrote and recorded in a day, I bet it’s something positive

A landmark essay in the genre of “everyone I’ve ever met hates me, can you believe it?”

Despise the pats, think Belichick’s fall from grace is very funny, but the idea he’s not a first ballot hall of fame is big dumb

Tom Homan attempting to do a speech like Tommy Lee Jones in The Fugitive but he keeps getting winded

I truly cannot understand the moral compass of any rep who even momentarily *thinks* about the political optics of decrying these maniacs.

Patel, seen here holding Greg Bovino in between his fingers

This is a great success but we can’t let it distract us from the task of continuing to bully Bovino the rest of his life

I don’t think a sadder personalized license plate exists in this world

Lots of mitigating factors sure but thought Sean Payton called a pretty terrible game there. Eh go Seahawks I guess

These guys are all just babies wearing monocles

Went to a protest this morning at Boise City Hall and am now providing solidarity to the following parade from Buffalo Wild Wings

Holding down the line, love to see it

Yes I’m sure the fastidious and thorough ICE officers acted in the moment due to highly considered information they acquired before surrounding a guy and popping his prone body a million times.

Starting to think that rightwingers have never been interested in using the second amendment to apply a consistent definition of tyranny

In the simplest possible terms, immigrants are not humans to these people. Their brains have already completed the dehumanization process that allows them to feel comfortable with everything they have done or will do and that’s a one way street they’re never coming back from.

Breaking: the president has been hospitalized with a bad case of what medical doctors call “deadite hand”

Correct, you do not turn the titanic around

Napoleon staring at this guy and thinking, well he’s clearly got some sort of complex about being a tiny man

Oh cool the president is doing “Gob talking about his suit” except with ending fake wars

Clearly just left his keys in the front door

Huge grain of salt considering how many states are missing but that mlb was ummmmm predictable

I get that his brain is a quivering mush from a combo of senility and the “lie enough about what you want to be true and it becomes true” thing he’s always done, but for real where did he get this idea that he’s been a force for peace? Feels like one day he just decided to believe he’s ended wars

So many people in the past decade could have used their power at any moment to go, we don’t have let things get this stupid, and they simply chose not to

Hmmm seems not ideal

Man I wish Drew Lock had been 20% better at football than he was, enough to stay on the field, because he was one of the funniest players I’ve ever seen. It was like watching a newborn deer attempt to play quarterback