ICE Unveils Flying K-9s That Only Respond to Commands in German

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Baptism Linked To Autism

Both sides hoping for The Rapture tomorrow.

I'm sorry I said your newborn baby was misbegotten

All groypers are gooners, but not all gooners are groypers.

Watching the President's health rapidly deteriorate like

Climate change? That's just Mother Nature throwing ass, and serving cunt.

Sorry I called your newborn baby "AI slop"

Ben Shapiro Orders Bulletproof Cuck Chair

Not tonight dear. I've got

Trump lost his virginity to his mother in a Cracker Barrel 🙏

The biggest letdown in the all-female Ghostbusters is that Slimer didn't eat pussy

Imagine stepping on a big pile of dog shit in these bad boys

Does Bud Light even know that they can get back in the good graces of conservatives by simply reintroducing the alcoholic dog who likes to get his dick wet?

R L Stine's early stuff

Just lost another tuxedo jacket to the self-flushing toilet.

Testing reveals that Virginia Foxx is made entirely of dust, tumors, and Fixadent.

People who say "This is what I voted for!" Should have a full size alligator thrown on their lap while they're going to the bathroom

Cuck chair? I think you mean the "bone throne".

ICE Reveals New Agent Uniforms

Trump Signs Executive Order Adding "Libtards" to Holy Bible

That fart was so hot, my underwear has grill marks

Queen bee: "Why is our honey full of used gum and cigarette butts??"

"Like honey from the lips of an Angel"

No offense but your newborn baby looks ran through as fuck

Snowden Removed from NSA Group Chat

Harriet Hageman is Al Franken's most obnoxious and upsetting character to date.

Delusional Oligarch's Government Exploiters

This candle smells like Harry Styles's vagina

I hate sitting on a cold urinal

There was an unfortunate wardrobe malfunction during Kendrick Lamar's halftime show when Trump shit up his own back and had to go home.

For me, the Super Bowl was over when Mom sent me to my room for tossing the 6-ft hoagie into Dad's saltwater fish tank.

Sesame Street is the fuckin' LEAST we can do for Iraq

It's called "sweetening the pot".

When someone presents you with a "fork in the road", scoop their eyeballs out with a spoon.

When you report an immigrant to ICE