you don't "take" someone's virginity. that's a truly gross view of sex rooted in rape culture by reducing the consent and agency of your partner. a sexual debut is an experience someone shares with you.

today I learned the new Kindles have speakers because my partner left his on the tv stand here. it scared the crap out of me when it randomly announced, "someone is at your front door" because his mail got delivered across town. how was I supposed to know the e-book could TALK?!

transphobia is misogyny wearing a different color outfit then trying to convince you that's an entirely new villain

I was thinking about women's visibility in the workforce and realized I have NEVER had a female pilot on any flight, even though 5% of commercial airline pilots are women. It would bring me so much joy to hear a woman's voice from the cockpit. Anyone gotten to experience that?

shoveling snow with my headphones on and "Where Is My Husband!" comes on...

there's no reason to ask "what do women want?" because it was definitively answered on Lip Sync Battle in 2017 women want a goofy little freak with quiet confidence, who will be ridiculous and sexy at the drop of a hat just to make her smile

Decided to torture myself tonight by watching "Babygirl" I'm 10min into it and pausing to remind myself out loud: "This is someone's kink and sexuality, and that's ok, but it sure ain't mine!" Glad this movie exists for whoever needed it, but I don't know who exactly that is...

I feel bad that cis men will never know the god-like power boost of another woman randomly giving you a compliment.

many grown men don't comprehend the difference between "being weirdly cute" and "being an annoying nuisance." while the line between the two is very different from person to person, y'all need to learn to read a glare or accept a correction when you've stumbled over that line.

As someone with a professional background in DV and coercive control, the most familiar part of Louis Theroux's Manosphere documentary is when he asks them simple questions in a gentle voice then waits in silence while these awful, often violent men gleefully tell on themselves.

I think high-schools should have a mandatory project where boys have to make a female-presenting social media account, use it 5 days a week for a semester, then do a class report on what they experienced. Would greatly open eyes, increase empathy, and expose that red pill shit.

kink requires informed consent of ALL participants btw

Guys! There's still time to celebrate International Women's Day by opening Venmo and sending $300 to any woman in your life with the memo "sorry." I guarantee you, she will know what its for.

The fun of an ensemble romance series is time passing. Being able to check-in on the lives of previous couples, seeing the group navigate difficult times together and growing a stronger bond. Not whatever tf Bridgerton is doing with Kate, Anthony, & Daphne absent from a funeral.

too many people never bothered to learn how to express a personal preference without being snobby, rude, or excluding others. jfc.

if you find being arrested on your birthday a tad harsh, there's an easy solution: don't molest kids

the new Wuthering Heights has me feeling like Fran Lebowitz in Pretend Its A City, more or less screaming: informed active audiences were overwhelmingly lost to HIV, and we still haven't recovered. we need an audience to drive art & culture, otherwise we get this absolute slop.

sometimes you need to mute people on social media, not because they're bad but because their takes are too childish to be a part of your day

every woman has a "this grown-up man tried to get with me when I was a teenager" story. often multiple stories. we are not surprised by how many men are into kids. we're disappointed that so many people are willing to accept and provide cover for this disgusting behavior.

talking to my partner about Catherine Breillat's films... him: didn't she direct the "vagina dentata" movie? me: technically no. but it is a film about using the vagina to frighten men. so spiritually yes, you could say TEETH is Breillat-ism and kick off a decent argument...

got to spend quality time with my family over the weekend 💖 now for my chronic illness payback: spending the week sleeping 18 hours a day, can't work, living in my pjs, pre-made food, needing help with everything, unable to tolerate sunlight, alarm every 4 hours to take Zofran

we really need to interrogate how we talk about weight. being fat is not a moral failing. weight has some bearing on health, but a person can be heavy and very healthy. many people are fat and happy. your fat friends and loved ones hear how cruelly you talk about fat people.

There is no male loneliness epidemic. Only emotionally underdeveloped violently unfuckable men with low social skills who perceive accountability as a personal attack: and grown men who live full and engaging lives, intentionally avoiding the first group for their own wellbeing.

calling yourself "submissive" to gain bodily access to someone you're attracted to doesn't make you submissive, it makes you dishonest and predatory. D/s requires respect and honoring boundaries on both sides of the slash.

things you can do to support trauma survivors in your life: - talk about expectations and boundaries before doing an activity - clarify your emotional state ("I'm not upset with you") - acknowledge when they've been vulnerable with you - thank them for their emotional labor

anger is a catalyst. if you sit in it, it burns you out. anger needs to be used as momentum, either to propel yourself away from a bad situation or to drive towards a better outcome. if you're angry right now, do something with it. speak out, protest, make art, care for others.

really wishing more people had listened to Anita Hill

Just heard a commercial with a fictional child diagnosed with cancer, and the mom starts asking questions... to ChatGPT. WTF?!? DO NOT SEEK MEDICAL HELP FROM AI!!! Pick up a book by an MD. Watch a PBS documentary. Get a Care Coordinator or Patient Advocate. You deserve better!

too many people want the benefits of being in a community (safety, support, grace, patience, education) without doing the work or developing the skills necessary to be part of a community (communication, conflict resolution, learning, speaking out, boycotts, protests, sacrifice)

every horrific thing that is happening right now is turning a profit for a small number of people; you need to hate those people, while loving and showing up for your neighbors

you do actually need to speak your politics out loud. it is necessary to weed out terrible heartless people from your daily life.

what a time to have critical thinking skills, pattern recognition, and a conscience...

our Nuremburg will be called the Pretti-Good Trials

rehearsing to sing for a friend's funeral tomorrow. on this hard day; do small things, show up for each other, and be kind.

its -12 and dropping, fuck ICE

coffee and barber shops are handing out free whistles. that's where we're at. its all hands on deck.

"If you just do as I say, I'll stop hurting you. You're bringing this on yourself." Every survivor of DV, SA, or child abuse knows these words. This is what ICE is saying to protestors exercising their constitutional rights. It is 100% about control through fear and violence.

resistance takes many forms: - protesting - documenting violence - coordinating information & supplies - maintaining whisper networks - providing medical care - legal/financial support - preserving knowledge, history, stories, ephemera do what you can, and be good to each other

I'm bisexual in that I'm attracted to confident women, and stray critters that present themselves to me as capable of learning tricks for my amusement

lets do better: RECLAIMING is when you or your trusted circle consensually address yourselves or each other by a slur to extinguish its oppressive power by bringing it into your identity or culture. if aimed at other marginalized people non-consensually, that's not reclamation.

helicopters approximately every 25 minutes

Parenting is one of the few jobs where you get to pick your co-workers. It is always your choice who you do that work with. Fire a teammate who thinks 10 minutes of daily effort is sufficient to support any relationship let alone a developing child.

Hudson Williams seems like a very empathetic soul. I hope that a trusted person in his life speaks to him about Nightwing being Romani--and the systemic oppression of our voices and culture. I hope he can champion an unknown Roma actor getting the same spotlight he did with Heated Rivalry.

Heated Rivalry's costume, hair & makeup teams really gave us a master class in how subtle styling choices impact the viewer's perception of age. A show filmed in weeks convincingly serves us actors playing their characters from 18 to 28. Amazing work!

if people were using generative Ai to make and distribute convincing images of white men committing illegal acts, the response would be very different. but because its women facing gender-motivated harassment, its crickets.

wow. media literacy is really taking its dying breath, huh?

Merry Queer Hockey Christmas to All 🎄💖

got big-spoilered for the new episode of Heated Rivalry, now I'm just marinating in what I know until I can watch it with my partner tomorrow

growth is hard, but its always worth it

you can't be a good person if you're a bigot