i'm also super irritated because when the hell did google maps get so laggy. thanks for telling me when to turn 20 seconds after i've passed it. fuck me i guess

i have got to get out of the ghetto man. something happens to one of our cars every 3 months like clockwork and every single time it gets me so heated it makes me want to adopt a rottweiler and spend my nights outside with a baseball bat. these loser FUCKS think they can do whatever they want

had to spend my lunch break going to get a locked gas cap because fuckers stole mine last night :') next on my list is security systems for ALL our vehicles because this is absurd. even moving the ever vulnerable bonnie into the driveway does not stop these pathetic clowns from helping themselves

i seem to have finally looped around the sun enough times that my family's genes kicked in and suddenly i am obsessed with spicy food. i completely understand why my dad & brother were like that about it now. everything i eat lately i'm like "but what if more hot sauce"

every time i look at the internet i feel at least 2% more geriatric. and i look at the internet a lot

the kids on twitter have discovered dog day afternoon. things are really looking up now

we got a lost cat flyer oh no :(((

sometimes i wonder if cathy ever notices me still adding songs to the goofin playlist after 3 fucking years

i'm the first one to get my full work week back. i choose to believe it's because my chefs just really fucking respect me

much like quicksand and the bermuda triangle, the threat of encountering a pizza with anchovies on it has proven to be a significantly lower risk in life than i was conditioned to expect

who up choosin they own adventure

i love how great snow is for isolating sound. i can chill in my car with the music loud and not be self conscious

come on loud as fuck 4 am chip bag be quiet for once

whenever i feel like dying i just listen to the beatles and remember who i am

if there's one thing that should be strictly tactile it's cars for FUCKS sake. literally what are we doing

cars are meant to be fucking tactile in every fucking regard

just found out if i instinctively put my car key in my back pocket there's a chance i butt-dial the fuckin hatch. which raises sooo slowwwlyyy and u have to wait to shut it again. this thing better behave cuz it's making me prefer bonnie more every day

neil young is stoner rock

waking up from a nightmare should be an instant flood of relief but instead it takes like an hour to come back to reality and calm down

The young'uns that were hired for the previous MST3K reboot were all very talented, and did a great job, but this time around the concept is, "What if we gave the old farts from the original show a shot?" Why not, right? I think it's gonna be fun.

god i wanna put the day away and try again some other time

Ghislaine Maxwell Reminded That A Simple ‘I’m Sorry’ Could Make This All Go Away https://theonion.com/ghislaine-maxwell-reminded-that-a-simple-im-sorry-could-make-this-all-go-away/

happy fool's spring to all who fall for it. i sure am

cold plus hopeless: copeless

can i go home

Stupid shit in my phone.

either apple skipped a bunch of songs in my playlist yesterday or i blacked out for like 6 hours. possibly both

don't know why i'm only just now listening to sloan's navy blues demos. it's so interesting hearing the embryos of what would become such perfect songs. i wish all their albums would get a deluxe reissue like this

thought putting cream on my hands before work today would protect them from getting dry and cracked but i forgot it's winter and there is no escaping shitty skin. now all my skin is chapped like i'm a molting lizard. and perhaps that's what i am anyways

almost 60° out rn but our driveway is in the shade so there's still crunchy ass snow everywhere. and i wouldn't have it any other way

i'm not kidding, i've gotten so good at dreaming that like 80ish percent of my dreams all take place in one shared parallel universe. if i was schizo and unemployed enough i could map the whole thing out on paper. it's like yume nikki without the terror

FISH/CLWNFISH.GIF

marlin

i wanna play a video game but idk what

you ever sleep so good you dream about sleeping

fell asleep before i even got around to cooking a pot pie. i must've been really tired

14 on the books tonight. gee whiz idk if i can handle everything myself

in 2015 i saw dog day afternoon for the first time and loved it so much i watched it 7 more times within a week. i'm not quite that insane these days but i am watching duel again for the second time in like 2 weeks. what is it with me and 70s movies anyway

it really is a shame you only get to watch any given film for the first time once

i'm not one for pretentious genre labelling but day of the lords by joy division is doom metal

i love having a car that isn't the cheapest fucking thing on earth. dropped a cigarette while driving and it actually didn't roll under the seat never to be seen again because this car's seats actually have frames they sit inside of

i don't mind being a booty call, i just wish there was a less scary way to get rid of body hair

it's been like 4 days and i still keep thinking about duel. by far my favorite film i've watched in years, how the hell had i never seen it before

history doesn't just rhyme, it spits bars

i just don't understand how there hasn't been a single actual racing sim with herbie in it, even as like an unlockable or whatever. i just wanna drive him

i keep looking for herbie mods in racing games but they all look wrong. is there not a single game where you can customize a perfect replica and race him on the same real life tracks he raced in the films. surely someone out there is as much of a dork about this as i am

if man was made in god's image then god is a total perv

last night i binged a bunch of the many, many horror flicks about evil possessed demon vehicles that kill people. i probably had some weird dreams after that but i don't remember them so

had a dream there was a ton of dominos in the fridge so i ordered dominos so there can be dominos in the fridge tomorrow. you should always follow your dreams